How about a Nobel Prize for sport?

By kazblah / Roar Guru

In recent days there have been Nobel Prizes handed out for physics, chemistry, medicine, literature and peace. But not sport.

In the 113 years since they started bestowing these lofty awards on ‘those who, during the preceding year, shall have conferred the greatest benefit on mankind’, not once have they named a Nobel Laureate for Sport.

Why not, apart from the fact that Alfred Nobel didn’t specify it in his will? Seriously people, are we going to allow ourselves to be dictated to by a long departed well-to-do sports wowser?

Nothing benefits mankind more than sport. Those who practise it get fit and healthy. If they’re good enough, they may even be exposed to the world of chemistry that the Nobel Committee prizes so highly.

Sport encourages teamwork and working together for the greater good, qualities admirably demonstrated in the dressing rooms of the English cricket team and our very own Wallabies.

It’s a tool, if a little ad hoc, for fighting poverty. Many poor illiterates have become rich illiterates, purely on their ability to run fast, kick a ball well or beat the crap out of another human being.

There is also the greater economic benefit provided to soft drink, fast food and alcohol companies associating their brands so congruously with the pursuit of good health. And the windfall which awaits any country that secures the right to host an Olympic Games or World Cup.

International sports competition bonds a nation. Just like war. But here’s the clincher. Sport is an instrument for world peace. Sepp Blatter says so. Only a few months ago, he was single-handedly trying to fix the Middle East.

“The problems between Israel and Palestine have been going on for more than 50 years and it would not be possible for us to solve them in one year,” he said days before the World Cup. “But we have made positive first steps.”

Quite what those positive steps are, no one knows. Sepp’s call for a universal truce for the duration of the World Cup was drowned out by gunfire. And his sideline gig as a peace broker got the wobbles aesthetically when two of the three doves released at the opening event crashed into the stands and carked it. But hey, it’s the platitudes that count.

Now, I know the Nobel Prize is a big deal. This year’s winners have been celebrated for such things as LED lighting, developing the microscopic means to see tiny, tiny, tiny things like Sepp Blatter’s IQ and cracking the brain’s navigation system.

So we can’t dish out a Nobel Prize for Sport for something trivial like winning a race. But there are still plenty of worthy contenders.

There’s Sepp, head of his very own United Nations.

Then there’s NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. Look at what he’s achieved this year in raising public awareness of domestic violence, without even trying.

Bernie Ecclestone might be considered for making Formula One so environmentally friendly. Sure, the fuel burned in one race could power my car for five years but let’s not quibble over petty details.

And what about Lance Armstrong, who donated his body to science for the duration of his cycling career. Is that not the kind of selflessness that is Nobel worthy?

I’m sure there are heaps of others we can think of. So let me know your nominations and I’ll get on the blower to Sweden and see if we can make this happen.

The Crowd Says:

To award the oldest winners Olympic and paralympic sports events, in either gold, silver and bronze medals categories all genders, in order to encourage the people worldover .

2014-10-13T23:23:43+00:00

mushi

Guest


Lets lobby to get him a nomination for Literature!

2014-10-13T23:22:18+00:00

mushi

Guest


If they have genuinely had that profound an impact they would be eligible for the Nobel Peace Prize. I think "in all seriousness" this would probably be the only way to get all the members of the various Swedish and Norwegian academies to burst into coordinated spontaneous laughter.

2014-10-13T12:40:39+00:00

Cunny Funts

Guest


I would like to nominate the mega-rich sporting philanthropists of the world for Nobel Prizes for their contribution to sporting excellence. Especially the billionaires who selflessly donate hundereds of millions of their slavishly hard-earned petrodollars to impoverished sporting institutions like Manchester City. Without their immensely generous input, over extended periods of months and sometimes even years, these desperately needy superstar athletes would only be able to play their chosen sports purely for fun. How boring would that be? Oh, and Kazblah, you've certainly put your hand up with this performance. Sure, in sport we can only take things one-week-at-a-time, but at the end of the day, this article was on its A-game all night and was executed perfectly, so it ticks all the right boxes. You win the Nobel Prize for The Roar!

2014-10-13T10:04:39+00:00

DaniE

Roar Guru


We could also have the sports 'Razzies' :D

2014-10-13T10:03:56+00:00

DaniE

Roar Guru


Maybe more of a special award, given at discretion instead of yearly?

2014-10-13T08:57:24+00:00

SandBox

Roar Guru


yeah Sepp a definite contender. OJ and OP for sportspeople that went nuts and then went full-Machiavelli to get off. "Never go half-Machiavelli" to paraphrase Tropic Thunder

2014-10-13T08:20:05+00:00

John Hamilton

Roar Pro


In all seriousness, I think that the idea of a Nobel prize for sport isn't necessarily a bad one. Recognise individuals (or clubs) that have gone to extraordinary lengths to use sport to bridge gaps in society

2014-10-13T05:42:35+00:00

Statistic Skeptic

Roar Pro


Laureus / Tennis Awards you mean? - 15 years of awards and the male award has gone to a tennis player 6/15 times and the female award 4/15. When they're meant to represent the pinaccle of world sport - doesn't compute that Tennis players have won a third of all individual awards on offer. (not to denigrate any tennis players, but the world is a big place).

2014-10-13T04:48:12+00:00

DaniE

Roar Guru


The photo of Sepp Blatter was my reminder :D

2014-10-13T03:53:45+00:00

SandBox

Roar Guru


I like the Machiavelli idea. Bernie Madoff would have to be a strong contender. In Sports: FloJo, Ben Johnson, Lance. All the drug cheats here: http://www.stuff.co.nz/sport/olympics/7474436/Sports-top-ten-most-notorious-drug-cheats They would qualify for the double: Noble and the Machiavelli. FloJo could get a triple. Noble, Machiavelli and Darwin Award

2014-10-13T01:23:42+00:00

DaniE

Roar Guru


On a slightly different note, I've sometimes wondered if there should be the inception of the international Machiavelli prizes... could have a separate category for sport. Competition would be quite strong I think. Anyway, moving on...

2014-10-12T23:25:21+00:00

josh

Roar Rookie


Laureus Awards not enough? http://www.laureus.com/

2014-10-12T22:18:40+00:00

mushi

Guest


I think the world cup bidding process shows a little hint of Nash equilibrium with the way Europe manages its rotation of the bidding process so as to avoid unnecessarily high bid costs and bribery fees for EU bids. You just don't get to see that kind of overt collusion anymore

2014-10-12T22:15:23+00:00

Professor Rosseforp

Guest


I would like to see the Nobel Prize for Sport as part of the Biochemistry award.

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