So there’s this Gary Larson cartoon in which a well-fed gorilla says to another gorilla: “You know, Sid, I really like bananas… I mean, I know that’s not profound or nothin’… Heck! We ALL do… But for me I think it goes much more beyond that.”
For the Gold Coast Titans, winning is that banana. It’s not profound or nothin’ to say that Gold Coast want to win.
Heck, all the gorillas in the NRL do. But there’s context for the Titans.
They also need to win.
It’s time. For themselves, for their people.
Winning is their entire organisation’s raison d’etre.
And not just games, the club wants to win everything: sponsors, community, ratings.
The players want to win weights sessions. They want to win at breakfast. They want to win at going out at night.
They didn’t do a great deal of winning in 2018 and nor did they do much in 2017. In 2016, they won 11 and lost 11, and were belted by Broncos first week of finals.
This year? Not a lot of winning.
And thus their brand upon the Gold Coast and elsewhere has been… what’s that term the kids use in memes?
The Titans have been a bit sort of… meh.
Titans coach Garth Brennan. (AAP Image/Michael Chambers)
How come?
Well, bottom line: they’re not very good.
Scratch that – they’re not bad. They’re not terrible.
They’re just not, well, good. They don’t know how to win. To close out games. To grab the throat of an enemy and crush his larynx with a sandled foot.
Off the field, they’re flying.
They’re out of administration and new owners are pumping in coin with no desire for financial return. Sponsors are signed up for two and more years. Their jumper and polo shirts are like the yellow pages.
Mal Meninga is overseeing culture while an executive chairman, Dennis Watt – the man who turned the Broncos into a powerhouse and cleaned up the Storm after scandal – oversaw the sale of the Titans to that rarest of beasts, philanthropic property developers.
On the playing list there’s young ones, new ones and old ones. And hot ones. Rep players. Origin players.
The backline’s got X-factor – Tyrone Peachey, Origin player – and speed – Brian Kelly.
Kelly’s come from Brookvale. In a sport of speedsters, he’s got a little bit of true gas.
Peachey is a huge in. He won a wrestling thing – the ‘King of the Ring’ – in the gym. Rangy strong, he bested many big units. Man can do anything. Freddy Fittler’s spirit animal.
Indeed, he’s close to your favourite player, the Peach. Club can build a club around a talisman, a cult hero. Peach would shrug, tell you it’s bullshit.
But there it is.
Ryley Jacks and Tyrone Roberts have come home from Melbourne and Warrington. Neither played last night.
Yet Ash Taylor has a surfeit of partners in the halves – even competition.
Shannon Boyd, international player, is another big in, the big yin. They took him to the beach to show it off, he said, “Don’t bother me with that, I’ll never set foot on it. Where can I buy a farm?”
They took him to the hinterland. Now he lives on 11 acres with horses and dogs.
Jai Arrow – Origin player – you’ll get 70 minutes from the breakout.
Nathan Peats – Origin player – will play long minutes before handing over to Mitch Rein, fringe Origin player.
Fullback AJ Brimson is the poor man’s Kalyn Ponga, if you’re going there.
Jarrod Wallace – Origin player – fit as he’s ever been.
Jarrod Wallace is one of a heap of Origin stars in the Titans line-up. (Photo by Chris Hyde/Getty Images)
Dale Copley and Brenko Lee are among four blokes who can play centre. Jacks has come from the Storm factory.
Kevin Proctor, international player, did too, he hasn’t shrunk any. Ryan James is fit as he’s ever been and a cusp Origin player.
Indeed there’s an Origin look to their pack.
So why are they bad? Or at least not that – you know – good?
Before the smoke had cleared at Suncorp Stadium on Thursday night, the Titans had knocked on off the kick-off and were a fingernail from giving up a try.
Josh Morris ran through them like old man river. He outpointed Kelly in all facets.
The Titans’ first try came from a pass so poor it cut out four men and outflanked the Sharks by skidding off the deck into Dale Copley’s arms.
Brimson’s try came from a dud pass by Cronulla and a 40-metre scoot.
Otherwise they threw it around and did their best.
“They’re an all or nothing team,” observed Andrew Johns. “If it sticks they can win by 20. If not they can lose by 30.
“I get the feeling the second half is going to be entertaining.”
Ask Garth Brennan what Titans footy should look like under him and he’ll tell you he wants to entertain.
“We’re in the entertainment business!” he says.
They train with intensity in defence. Watch their training, it’s physical, semi-opposed, hard.
They’re not expression sessions – they are about “shape”.
They practice a kicking game that pins the other mob deep, and then attacks in defence. Not the mad science of Scientology, but rip it off and it can be brutally effective.
But there is the rub.
Doing it, a lot.
Like the Raiders for the last 25 years, Gold Coast’s natural attack can get them into a lead. It’s then they need play-makers to close down games, pin the opposition deep. And send in the beasts to smash them.
The champion sevens – your Thurstons and Cronks – do it by rote.
Taylor and Brimson are not those people.
Peachey should be closer to the ball, a running five-eighth to complement Taylor’s ball play.
Taylor, too, should run more. Create uncertainty in lumbering pigs.
Brimson’s either your fullback or utility. Mickey Gordon’s in there somewhere. He’s three years older than Morris.
Top fella to have around the club. A hard man. Soft tissue injuries waiting to happen.
Taylor’s performance behind this Origin-strong forward pack is one of the greater subtexts of the season.
It’s time for Ash Taylor to step up. (Photo by Jason O’Brien/Getty Images)
He turned 24 the day the club lost to Canberra in Round 1.
New contract, big money, heightened expectation. The Titans lost a slew of close games in 2018.
They led in 16 of 24 matches, won only eight. They couldn’t get it done at the death. Couldn’t close.
And they know it’s on the No.7 to own that. The big units can do only so much.
Taylor’s under the pump. His time is now.
He owns this loss much as anyone. Especially given the Sharks lost Andrew Fifita after six minutes and Matt Prior lasted 19 minutes. Taylor couldn’t attack those tired leftovers?
Five minutes to half-time they converted field position and possession. Rein’s service was crisp. Taylor grubbered behind the D-line. Peachey, one away from him, fell on it.
Somehow the Titans led by eight at half-time.
Kelly knocked on. Gave away a penalty on Morris. The veteran had a blinder, gave the boy a bath.
Taylor threw a punch at Josh Dugan. Would’ve been better teasing his haircut, a terrible creature, roadkill racoon.
Aaron Gray scored a double, a chunky man. Chad Townsend was super.
Gordon knocked on. Kelly pumped a grubber dead. Had a shocker, Bri.
Peachey copped a whack in the chops, gave up a penalty. Kyle Flanagan – who’d chunked it all night – drilled the two points.
Peachey put the ball into touch when play was required. Outside his try, the marquee man was poor.
And after Paul Gallen rolled over near the posts and converted the Titans knew ignominy. And trudged off knowing that, as a unit, they’d found another way to choke on the banana.
db
Guest
Gary Larson's work is still relevant today. 'The Far Side' remains a great source of mirth and merriment.
Big Daddy
Guest
When you look at players going up and down from Canterbury Cup and top grade on a regular basis particularly in the bottom Sydney teams it makes you wonder why they got rid of NYC. The new regurgitated Flegg comp has only 12 or so teams in Sydney comp only and some of these guys are only 17 so can't play up and some Canterbury Cup player's that are good cannot play up because they are not in top 30 roster Go work it out. Segeyaro had signed with Broncos because he can only play Canterbury Cup because of product salary cap rules.
DP Schaefer
Roar Rookie
Too true.
Insider
Roar Rookie
Ya know as long as he and his wife are ok that’s all that matters
DP Schaefer
Roar Rookie
Peachiy cost them that game, should be in reggies next week. Titans needs to start playing and thinking like winners. Mind you, this loss should kick some response into them and they have the Dogs next.
DP Schaefer
Roar Rookie
Goodness no, they have problems (heaps) but it's insane to be letting them die while talking about bringing in another Brisbane team.
DP Schaefer
Roar Rookie
I saw that. Wonder how he is going in the head. ie. read to play?.. glad its over?.. chip on the shoulder? .. going to take out his frustrations on Sharkies? all will be revealed..
Rob
Guest
What age was JT when he got his starting job at the Cowboys in 2005? A Cowboys team that had already beaten Premiership winners Bulldogs, Brisbane in the semifinals and lost by 3 points to the Roosters in the Preliminary final in 2004. Taylor has come back injury and did everything required to get the Titans in a winning position last night IMO.
Don
Roar Rookie
Yet the Warriors were unreal in the NYC but their senior sides have largely performed terribly... I put zero stock in the NYC. Melbourne used the Intrust Cup to teach their best kids - played them against men fighting to be noticed and earn an NRL contract, rather than starring against the same kids they've beaten since they were 13 who've been recruited out of school.
Rob
Guest
I can’t buy that because the Storm have blown all those excuses bits. I suffer hateful envy towards the Storm because they stuff all my blood excuses.
Albo
Roar Rookie
He has a great short kicking game that creates some tries. But he has never developed other aspects of his game that he needs to , if he is to be true leader of that team. He is still carrying weight that must be impacting his overall performance ?
Insider
Roar Rookie
WALKER NOT GUILTY!
Albo
Roar Rookie
Spot on ! Its all about the errors and wrong options that make the Titans or any other team look ordinary. The bottom 8 teams are all in the same boat right now. Showing ability at times but no consistency or control. The difference I believe is the lack of committed on-field game management. Missing are the required leaders on the park that can assist the rest to consistently maximise delivery of the team's good performance. The Chooks , Storm & Rabbitohs have the best of this on-field management right now via their experienced champs like Smith , Munster, Cronk, Keary, Teddy, Sam B, Reynolds, & Sutton, and the table reflects this. Who are the Titan's on field leaders ? The Titans have a bunch of "hand me downs" tossed aside by other clubs. There is little attachment for these players to the local area to drive extra effort, and the best leader they ever had was import Greg Bird now driving the Catalan's performances in the Super League. Until a group of Titans can develop, either from the local area or maybe with the right added imported ( leadership ) ingredient, I expect they will go the way of all Gold Coast sporting teams , as always being in the bottom half of things except for best suntans. They need an era like the Panthers had in the late 80's early 90's or the Knights had in the late 90's early 2000's where a group of locals developed together and finally graduated together ( Alexander, Geyer, Izzard, Cartwright , or Johns , Johns, Buderus, Harrigan ) to dominate their time. It will need need some strong off field management to develop & retain such a group of players from the area until they reach the top. Have they got such a determination or will the sun , surf & Jupiters still dominate ?
Griffo
Guest
Sorry mate, Gary Larson's work lost relevance for me when Johnathan Thurston broke his consecutive origin games record.
Dutski
Roar Guru
I was pondering this last night. There’s quality sprinkled throughout this team. All the components are there. I honestly think that the issue is that they’re just trying too hard. Centres rushing up in defence, wingers rushing in, Peachey trying to do it all himself, Cartwright trying to be a second 5/8 are all signs of people overtrying. There needs to be people just doing their own job. Their defensive structures are a bit of a mess too - no trust in the man inside. Taylor is another story. He seems to be going into his shell when the team needs him to stamp his authority. His confidence is down - but how can he have confidence when he has second rowers drifting across putting plays on and centres kicking willy nilly. What needs to happen ideally is for Taylor to say to Peachey “Call for it when it’s on, otherwise shut it and do what I say”, and ditto to Cartwright “Stand over there and run straight.” If he can’t do that then he needs to drop to the ressies and learn to do it there.
Rob
Guest
Totally agree with the poor discipline in the Peachy retaliation. It’s interesting however when it comes to the officials actions. Before the video officials came into vogue retaliation was regarded as dumb and poor discipline. Then the video came and players started to retaliate to anything they found offensive. The bunker would look at it and advise to penalise any minor instigating. NSW made it a plan under Stuart and Gallen. Peachy has to get a new message that he is playing for the Titans and neither NRL or Phil Gould are going to look after you now.
Superspud
Roar Rookie
I think the problem for the Titans is that the players find it too easy to lose. The word culture is a bit overhyped but in this case it's true. Good players go there but losing is accepted not just by the team but by everyone. Newcastle had that a few seasons ago players like the Simms brothers and Joey Leilua flourished when they left. Does anyone remember in the early 2000s at Manly? Everything changed when Des signed as coach and Ben Kennedy signed. The Coast need a Des and a Ben Kennedy right now.
Superspud
Roar Rookie
Chad Townsend should be the blues number 7. The only time NSW beat the champion QLD side in 2014 tgey had a half who organised and got the ball to who and where it was needed.
astro
Roar Rookie
A quick look at the stats tells you all you need to know...12th in time in possession, 12th in completed sets, 5th in errors and 5th in missed tackles. Basically, they make a lot of fundamental mistakes which cost them game after game. Add to that they have one of the weakest 'spines' in league. A bunch of Origin-level players aren't much use if none of them occupy the key positions...ask the Broncos. Gordon, Brimson, Taylor and Rein just aren't good enough. Their big missed opportunity (if you can call it that) was the DCE signing. They have him, and this is a competitive top 8 team.
Rob
Guest
I have been reading for years you can’t blame a half for those around him missing tackles and dropping balls? It’s all about the Try Assist? If Wallace, Peachy and Cartwright don’t make school boy errors or gift poor discipline penalties. The Titans win? They concede 27 possessions from the opening kickoff because Brimson pass the ball into a charging Wallace’s head that was close to forward anyway.