Last Friday night’s Richmond-Collingwood mockbuster had everything you’d want from a game of football except for a good game of football.
It was one of the most poorly played matches you’ll ever see – a chaos of ill-advised decisions and comical skill errors. When Marley Williams wasn’t skying kick-ins to the corridor he was chipping them short to yellow and black guernseys.
Tyrone Vickery and Sam Lloyd, two perfectly capable kicks for goal, were looking to pass off regulation shots inside 50, seemingly afraid that the game’s woeful disease was endemic, and might spread to them in front of 72,000 people. Watching the farce from my seat on the MCG’s fourth level, my biggest regret was that the stadium didn’t extend to a fifth, eighth and 17th level which I could escape to in order to distance myself from the game’s stench.
But the beauty of football is that a player, a team, or a match has the ability to find redemption in a single minute.
When Jack Riewoldt capitalised on some miserable Jack Frost defending to goal at the 21-minute mark of the final quarter to put the Tigers up 17 points, the game was over. Collingwood were getting dominated in the clearances and possession count, and on the occasions that they did find the ball they explored new and exciting ways to butcher it, as is their custom.
They’d eked out a mere ten goals for the entire match to that point, their midfield lacked any semblance of fluency and their forward line was hopefully disjointed. There was nothing to suggest that they could kick the three straight goals they needed to win the match. Nothing except Richmond.
When the Pies did the impossible, and I wondered aloud to myself at the final siren, ‘Wait, do Collingwood actually get four premiership points for this?’ the only thing louder than the Magpie euphoria at the MCG was the silent, accepting desolation of the Richmond fans walking to the exits. They knew this was coming.
When Riewoldt kicked his last goal I turned to The Roar’s Cam Rose and started talking about what this loss would mean for Collingwood’s season, and how they would really need to win their next three games (St Kilda, Melbourne and Essendon) to get to 3-2 before a trip to West Coast. He cautioned me with a sad grin: “Jay, if you think this game is over, you don’t know a thing about Richmond.” It turns out I didn’t.
Defeat often becomes so engrained in a club that it starts to emerge as a self-fulfilling prophecy. When the ball bounced to Stephen Milne’s right, of course it did, this is what happens to the Saints. When Tony Liberatore celebrated his potentially game-sealing goal in the 1997 preliminary final, of course it was called a behind, this is what happens to the Bulldogs.
We don’t think of Richmond in the same breath as St Kilda and the Dogs because the Tigers have a huge following and ten premierships in their history. But the reality is that Richmond haven’t won a flag since 1980 and they’ve won just two finals in the past 33 years. Since the dawn of the AFL in 1990, Richmond have been the competition’s worst team.
More than three decades in a desert of losing and drinking from the false oases of Aaron Fiora, Clinton King and all their other failed draft picks has led Richmond fans, justifiably, to expect crushing disappointment. Walking out of the MCG last Friday night there was very little anger on the faces of Richmond fans – instead they were plastered with bleak, knowing smiles. Of course they’d lost the game that was impossible to lose.
The Tigers have oscillated between mediocrity and abject dreadfulness in their first two games this season. They pinched a victory against a team widely tipped to finish in the bottom two, and then they threw away the game against the Pies, who have been the worst team in the AFL in the competition’s first fortnight. For a team with top four aspirations, it’s been an uninspired start.
But the Tigers aren’t the Tigers yet. Brett Deledio, Ivan Maric and Shane Edwards, three of the team’s best players, will come back, and Chris Yarran, the dynamic off-season recruit, is yet to debut. Richmond aren’t perfect with their list construction but they have very few holes.
Alex Rance, when he isn’t gifting the opposition multiple goals in the dying minutes, is still the league’s most influential defender. Riewoldt and Vickery form a 1-2 key forward punch that stacks up to most in the competition. The midfield is not a devastating force, but it’s honest enough, and finds a healthy balance between stars and role players.
But the real reason for Richmond optimism, the tattooed glimmer of hope shining through 36 years in the wilderness, is the man who lives free and dies freer.
Rance is Richmond’s best player and Deledio is their most well-rounded and versatile. But the Tigers will only go as far as Dustin Martin can take them.
Martin was last Friday night’s most dominant figure, and his entire palette of talents was on full display. He glides around the ground with a smoothness that belies his build and a grace that belies his haircut. We tend to associate the ability to ‘break the lines’ with foot speed, but the ball moves faster through the air than the feet do on the ground, and Martin is a line-breaker with his incisive kicking ability. He rifles passes low and hard and he lofts goals long and high.
And then there’s his strength. Dustin Martin is a FORCE. In the clutter of nervousness and juvenile skills on display last Friday night, Martin and Scott Pendlebury were the two most composed figures, and their composure came from opposite sources.
Pendlebury is an artist, a feathery football scientist who eludes the opposition with timing, deftness and sleight of hand. He sees events before they occur. Martin on the other hand sees the events right as they occur and tells them to go to hell. His composure isn’t as cunning as Pendlebury’s but it’s every bit as majestic, and much more imposing. He takes more time than most players with the ball because he knows that he’ll always have the strength to create extra seconds for himself when he needs to.
Magpie guernseys came at him from all angles all night and he fended them off with ease, like a 17-year-old palming off a slew of desperate 12-year-olds. The one time the Pies did bring him down, late in the second quarter, it took three of them to do so.
Martin is not flawless. He has ranked first and third in the competition for clangers per game the past two seasons and is prone to the occasional shanked kick. But the clangers also just point Martin’s greatness – he is totally fearless, unafraid of the contest and unafraid of pulling the trigger on a bulleted pass through traffic in the corridor. He lives free and dies free with his decision making, and he lives more often that not.
While beautiful kicks of the ball like Pendlebury, Robbie Gray and Brendon Goddard went through last season handballing just as much as they kicked, Martin kicked the ball twice for every handball. In a midfield that is often defined by Trent Cotchin’s suffocating conservatism, the aggression of Martin, physically and mentally, gives Richmond life going forward.
The Tigers’ #4 is already one of the competition’s elite players. He’s increased his disposal tally every season he’s played, and he’s kicked at least a goal per game in each of the last five seasons. Patrick Dangerfield has only done that once in the past four years, Nat Fyfe once in the past six, and Pendlebury has never done it.
Martin’s off-field behaviour isn’t exactly presidential, but it’s all part of the package. You can’t have the audacious fend-offs without the chopstick assault threats (well, maybe you can). But Richmond don’t need someone to calmly and politely guide them forward. They need someone to punch history in the face and drag them back to success. It’s hard to think of many better candidates for that role than Dustin Martin.
Tricky
Guest
We may have had it "pretty good" as you say but the disappointing thing we have to win finals and flags by "weight of numbers" just as now we rely on "grunt" instead of basic skill - if we weren't so wasteful in both areas we'd have way more flags and we'd be a contender this year instead of bottom 4 standard. Super frustrating
BigAl
Guest
Excellent article Jay, one of the best I've read here for a while. Following his antics and achievements on and off the field, I sometimes feel perversely sorry for him, in that ...It's not his fault that he was born with such sublime footballing talents ! .
Jay Croucher
Expert
I'm actually a Collingwood supporter too, Tricky. I think it's a bit harsh saying that the Pies are 'not far off' being the worst performing team since the AFL's inception. The Pies might 'only' have two flags since 1990, but only West Coast, Hawthorn, Geelong and Brisbane have more in that time. Also, Collingwood fans tend to forget that we're not that far removed from making the finals every year from 2006 to 2013, an eight-year run that is the envy of many fanbases. In short, we've had it pretty good. As far as Collingwood's present day situation, we're on the same page. I wrote about the Pies last week - http://www.theroar.com.au/2016/03/31/black-white-comedy-will-collingwood-bounce-back/ - and there's only so much woeful disposal a fan can handle. The end of my tether fast approaches.
Tricky
Guest
Very amusing article Jay, I gather you're a tigers supporter? If so take heart in fact all of you tigers fans because I barrack for the other excuse of a team. Since the AFL's inception you stated that Richmond have been the worst performing and at a guess we're not far off, since 1990 we've played 5 GF's and only won 2. In fact we've played 43 in total for our measly total of 15, also (not sure of the numbers) but we've lost more finals than won. This year and in the near future at least take solace in the fact that there is a lot of room for improvement in your disposal no where near your best, where as for us it's is good as it gets, our disposal is deplorable which is why we rely on "grunt" work, contested ball and running to position etc and now we can't even win that. This rubbish optimism about Collingwood's "talent" and "depth" is bollocks, if we're so good why do kick and handball like a bunch of unco nerds from the science department and why are 3rd last in efficiency? Apart from Pendles we're just a bunch of flogs.
David Ward
Roar Guru
Yes, Dusty and Rance, 2nd and 1st in last year's B&F, and both with their best footy still ahead of them. And the two players Daniel Richardson went within millimetres of losing with his prudent, steady-as-she-goes approach to list management. War chests don't win premierships, Dan. Nor does self-congratulation. Pretty simple equation - get us a young midfield gun in the next off-season, or clean out your desk.
David Ward
Roar Guru
Good work, Jay. Dusty actually was dishing out don't-argues as a 17 year old - it was to the hard bodies of the Hawthorn midfield in a pre-season game about 7 years ago, the first time most of us had seen him play. We got a 70-plus point flogging and he was among the best few afield. Played then pretty much as he plays now, with neither fear nor malice. About 6 weeks later the rumour mill had it that GWS had offered him 700K and the keys to the Rooty Hill Plaza. I tell you, you've never seen so many mild-mannered, well-spoken, skivvy-wearing, Blue Nile-loving Tiger fans - the majority of us - ready to take up baseball bats and march on AFL headquarters. For some reason we thought the AFL might not be above engineering a bit talent-diversion to the expansion clubs. No one at Tigerland has ever doubted his abilities. He's been remarkably consistent given his reported struggles with the professional disciplines, the most consistent in my view. But the aggregate stats lie about Dusty. He needs to relieve his captain of some hard ball responsibility, and he should kick a lot more goals - he kicks three or four in half a quarter and then averages about one every 8 quarters for the next couple of months. With his capabilities he should be kicking 40 plus, even as a part-time forward. The clanger count wildly overstates his profligacy, too. He and Deledio are the only two who can kick long and creatively to position, so I expect they've got a bit of licence to be speculative. Minders willing, he'll get better yet.
Chancho
Roar Rookie
Great article Jay! It's funny, when you have a look at that club, they certainly have the 'infrastructure' to have been successful, they have just wasted it really. I suppose the same could be levelled at Carlton, except they have seen success and are maybe still feeling the effects of the salary cap issue, albeit that was a while ago now. Im now thing where do they go to from here. Ok, they are missing some key players and you can give them some latitude for that, but that cant explain how terrible they were in the Collingwood game. Look at Hawthorn, they're missing a bunch of guys, some as influential to that side as those missing for Richmond, but they exploited the opportunity in front of them (its obviously not a perfect example, but a guide at least). What about their experienced players, bar Martin, none of them took the game on either. I just think they may have plateaued under Hardwick. Credit to him, they have progressed since Wallace and they were at a low ebb but Hardwick I don't think is a premiership coach, at the moment or at this club at least. Then I saw this week that the players 'put their hand up and took responsibility'... I mean, what does that really achieve?
Ryan Buckland
Expert
I'm just pleased to hear that you're both ok; I feared the worst after Friday...
DingoGray
Roar Guru
The poor Richmond folk.... Yet they still get Gems like Dusty and Rance...... GOD (The footy version) is a such a wonderful thing!
Gecko
Guest
Great observation about Martin's lack of leadership aura. He can set an example with his aggression and risk-taking but the players around him rarely follow. It does seem to be Deledio and Maric that, for Richmond, lift the players around them. Their absence in 2014 coincided with a Richmond trough, just like now. When they return, I think we'll see a more confident Richmond.
Seano
Guest
Cam this is one of the reasons I feel ok with the bombers saga, yes it sucks and we were stupid but I have seen 4 flags and 6 GF's in my 36 years so it all evens out.
Tanami Mehmet
Guest
Richmond is a the definition or "The more things change, the more they stay the same". Being a supporter of another club I do love their promising so much before falling down. Though I can empathize with those unfortunates who support them. You must feel like Euripides is writing a play about your club.
Lamby
Roar Rookie
Great article - one of the best I have read for a while. As a Crows supporter I am a bit scared of all these articles highlighting Richmond's flaws as you just know they will come out this week and show why they have been talked about for top 4 (though never by me.) It should be a great game. The Crows match up pretty well with the Tigers. Riewoldt normally can't get a kick on Talia and Tex is one of the few forwards who can out-run, out-muscle and out-mark Rance (last game Tex had 10 marks, 21 disposals & 2 goals 5).
Cameron Rose
Expert
Great stuff Jay. And I know all about that sad grin - it's been a fixture on my face at Richmond games too many times over the years. Two winning finals in 33 years. It's just so bleak when you see it in print. Especially given I'm 35. What a life of football misery.
Pumping Dougie
Roar Guru
I think Richmond players should punch Each Other in the face after last week's performance. Love your article Jay - very talented writing. Dusty was the one player who performed well across the four quarters. I'm surprised how often he fends off opponents and gets away with it - you'd think opposition teams would be awake to the tactic by now. It's entertaining to see him do it over and over again, and continually succeed with it. My only criticism of his game last Friday is that he seemed to go missing in the final 5 minutes when Collingwood made their charge. But he's got enough runs in the bank of performing well in critical moments of games. I don't know what it is - maybe it's his introverted shyness - but despite his fend offs and match day impact, I reckon he lacks the onfield authority and leadership aura to bring his team along with him. Whenever he does great things in games, it's as if he's a kangaroo bobbing around in a mob of emus.
Wilson
Roar Guru
Jay Great Artilce and I think you have brought something up that I have been thinking for years and that is Martin is elite player but due those around him and what some think a elite player should be he is over looked alot. and as you say "Richmond don’t need someone to calmly and politely guide them forward. They need someone to punch history in the face and drag them back to success."