England’s Ashes preparations were dealt a heavy blow last night when they were humiliated by Ireland, who bowled them out for 85 in the first session of the one-off Test match at Lord’s.
That was England’s lowest Test total since, well, not that long ago actually – they were rolled for 77 by the West Indies in January and for 58 by New Zealand just over a year ago.
England have a formidable bowling attack in home conditions, which has helped them to lose only one of the past 12 Test series they have hosted.
But Ireland’s routing of the home side underscored just how fragile England’s Test batting line-up has become.
Over the past 18 months, England’s average score in their first innings in Tests has been paltry at 245. And that’s despite their lower order bailing them out of trouble again and again.
In that time England, quite incredibly, have been four wickets down for 100 or less in 18 out of their 29 Test innings. Let that stat sink in for a moment.
Their top three against Ireland of Rory Burns, Jason Roy and Joe Denly was widely predicted in the British media to be the same one they’ll field in next week’s opening Ashes Test.
It is arguably the weakest top three of any of the top eight-ranked Test sides in the world.
Between them Burns, Roy and Denly have made 441 Test runs at 23. Burns and Denly have had shaky starts to their Test careers while Roy has rarely opened in his first-class career and, similar to fellow ODI opener Aaron Finch, has a loose technique and questionable temperament better suited to white ball cricket.
Australia’s pace attack will cherish the chance to bowl at a trio of top order batsmen still trying to find their feet in Tests.
Burns (6), Roy (5) and Denly (23) all failed last night as Irish seamer Tim Murtagh (5-13) ran amok. About to turn 38 years old next week, Murtagh was bowling mostly between 118 and 123kmh as he got rid of Burns, Roy, Jonny Bairstow, Moeen Ali and Chris Woakes, with those last three all making ducks.
England’s Joe Denly (AP Photo/Kirsty Wigglesworth)
Murtagh’s efforts should have reminded the Australian selectors that, on traditional English pitches, accuracy and skill win out over pace and intimidation.
When Moeen was out England was 7-43. That was almost as bad as in Auckland last year when the Kiwis reduced England to 9-27 on day one of the first Test.
Coming, as it did, immediately after a 4-0 flogging in the Ashes, that collapse in New Zealand was one of the lowest moments in England’s modern Test history.
Yet if they are now defeated by Ireland, after losing their previous Test series 2-1 to the struggling West Indies, that would almost match it.
England, of course, are significantly understrength in this current match. They rested Ben Stokes and Jos Buttler, while quicks James Anderson, Jofra Archer and Mark Wood were all unavailable due to injury.
Regardless, a loss to the minnows Ireland would be a horrendous lead-up to the Ashes against an Australian side that is ripe for the picking.
The fragility of the Australian batsmen has been exposed also in recent days as they have crumbled on a seaming deck in the intra-squad match in Southampton.
That would have put a smile on a lot of faces in the England camp. Then they got rolled for 85 by England and frowns abounded.
Cari
Roar Rookie
What a difference a day makes.
Duncan Smith
Roar Guru
No wonder they focus on one day cricket.
Partyhat
Roar Rookie
Ps , at least we’ve cemented our opening pair...... Roy and Leach....... will be like Hayden and Langer in their pomp!
Partyhat
Roar Rookie
Sorry Chris but this is ABSOLUTELY an Ashes warm up and nothing more. You can say England took Ireland lightly, they’re arrogant , expect to win, yada yada the usual phrases that get trotted out but I for one am well happy there was a match between the World Cup win and the Ashes. I feel there was always going to be a bit of an adjustment and even watching it took me a while to get used to the white clothes and red ball, seems so long since I’d seen it! I’m an England fan and looking forward to the series but can’t really tell what’s going to happen except… best wishes to anyone who buys tickets for days 4 and 5!
Sgt Pepperoni
Roar Rookie
Have eng just found the solution to their opener dilemma? Leach for PM?
Peterj
Guest
Absolutely I agree with you about wasting the ball but yesterday he certainly had few chances where his teammates let him down. Do you think they’ll pick Starc? After the squad match it must be hard for them to justify it.
Jero
Roar Rookie
Exactly as I thought, Sergeant. What with the infamous album cover and all.
matth
Roar Guru
Well that was hard to watch... actually no it wasn’t, might go and watch the highlights again- and again
Sgt Pepperoni
Roar Rookie
'mints wrapped in Sandpaper' You mean fishermens friends?
Sgt Pepperoni
Roar Rookie
Well I'm all for the ridiculous as my name attests Anyway that's a chapter in history I had no idea about. Very interesting YouTube video with some interesting comments discussing the validity of the sources This sort of stuff is exactly what I love about the roar
Dublin Dave
Guest
Not respecting "lesser" opponents is a weakness that carries across to English teams in other sports too. In rugby in particular, Ireland has a record against England in recent years that it really shouldn't have if England had turned up mentally for many of the games. Contrast that with the All Blacks, who ALWAYS at least give the opposition the respect of treating them seriously. If that means they put 100 points on you, then so be it. But you know that any win you achieve against them you really had to earn. Anyway, so much for other sports. One wicket down already in the second innings, and it wasn't even the Night Watchman's!! He's currently England's highest scorer in the match. :)
Jero
Roar Rookie
Where’s your sense of the ridiculous, Sgt Pepperoni? Does it always have to be serious around here? There’s even a romantic thread, with a Turkish sailor meeting an Irish farm girl who finds herself torn by her emotions, according to IMDB. Can’t wait to see it, though at a guess, it will go “straight to video”. Unlike this game, if the Irish get up. A second wicket would help.
Sgt Pepperoni
Roar Rookie
Hold on hold on Are you saying there is a historical link between the Turks and the Irish that's forming the basis of their modern day sporting sponsorships? Well I for one hope that you're right on the money
Jero
Roar Rookie
Not so fast, Sgt Pepperoni…. turns out the fabled story of how Ottoman Sultan Khaleefah Abdul-Majid the First sent 1,000 pounds to Ireland’s farmers during the Potato Famine in the 1840s is coming to a screen near you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0bAiyJCwVU https://www.irishcentral.com/business And guess who the villains are in the plot line….. why the Brits of course!! This is just history repeating itself, at Lords!
Sgt Pepperoni
Roar Rookie
Anyone else find it bizarre that Ireland are sponsored by Turkish airlines? Wtf
Ronan O'Connell
Expert
Fair enough Peter. But Broad was widely derided by English pundits and fans yesterday for butchering the new ball by bowling way too short and wide, the opposite of what Ireland did. This allowed Ireland to leave a ton of balls and get through the critical first 12 overs without losing a wicket - by comparison England lost 4 wickets in their first 12 overs. He bowled better later but Broad has been regularly wasting the new ball for years now, a bit like Starc.
Peterj
Guest
Normally I agree with you Ronan but Broad was the pick of England’s bowlers yesterday and based on that plus his experience and combination with Anderson I think they will pick him for the first test.
JOHN ALLAN
Guest
What about mints wrapped in Sandpaper? OK with you?
Chris Kettlewell
Roar Guru
Yeah, getting through that initial difficult patch with the new ball on tough wickets is the key. If they can get through that then they can cash in. Anderson may well play. I'm sure he'll play some part in the series. Whether he's at 100% or not is the question I guess. And also, at what point he starts to decline. Certainly his returns in England haven't been based on outright pace and athletic ability, but just on swing, skill and experience, meaning he's likely to be able to keep it going to an older age than some fast bowlers. But he's still 37, and one does wonder whether he will be able to keep replicating those sorts of performances.
Ronan O'Connell
Expert
Anderson and Woakes are certainties for the 1st Test but Curran could easily edge out Broad for that third spot. Broad has really struggled for impact in county cricket this season, has a poor recent record in Tests and is now a bunny with the bat which is a big deal for England because they're fixated on having a very strong tail and Curran is a much, much better batsman.