After the Melbourne Storm’s victory over the Penrith Panthers in the NRL Grand Final on Sunday night, it was unfortunate that a significant chunk of the chatter was dedicated to the commentary of the game – specifically Gus Gould’s – rather than the game itself.
It wouldn’t really be rugby league unless there was some type of controversy that overshadowed proceedings, and the latest drama was over Gould’s perceived bias towards Penrith, and against Melbourne, as he called the premiership decider for Channel 9.
I’m not overly enthusiastic to dedicate any further oxygen to that story, but I do think Gus could have chosen his words a bit more carefully when he said Penrith were “on top”, despite being down 16 points to zero.
Given the fact everyone knows he was recently the boss at Penrith, the optics of him being “friendly” to a team that was well behind on the scoreboard were . . . well, sub-optimal.
When Gould doubled down on his viewpoint after the game, it only angered people more, but the post-match rage from fans across the country (well, eastern seaboard anyway) actually took me to a slightly different place, and on another tangent: it forced me to think about what my ‘Dream Team’ would be for the TV coverage of rugby league in Australia.
While pondering such a hypothetical, it became clear to me that it’s not just about on-air talent, it’s about the overall content as well. So below is the perfect package on my imaginary rugby league channel:
Commentary teams
Team A
• Play-by-play announcer: Andrew Voss
• ‘Colour’ analyst: Greg Alexander
• Sideline: Hannah Hollis
Team B
• Play-by-play announcer: Warren Smith
• ‘Colour’ analyst: Andrew Johns
• Sideline: Brad Fittler
Now, you actually need more than two commentary teams with the travel required for eight games per round, but I’ll keep it simple for the purposes of this discussion.
I think Voss and Smith are the two best callers, and pick themselves. I could easily be talked into Ray Warren replacing Smith, as I still think he’s great, but I did have one eye on the future, and I’m unaware of how many more years Rabs is keen to keep going,
From an in-game analyst perspective, ‘Brandy’ is the best. Smart, articulate, sharp and with no agendas and BS, he’s a joy to listen to. Meanwhile, when Joey sticks to the footy and doesn’t try to be sensationalistic, he’s brilliant. I often think he’s too influenced by those around him, so I’m keen to break that up.
Andrew Johns (Tony Feder/Getty Images)
On the sidelines, Hollis really knows her stuff and is a true professional. She’s great down on the pitch, but should also be groomed for a larger role.
Fittler’s chemistry with Joey is undeniable, and it’s also clear players and coaches respect him too, so he’s an obvious candidate for interviews pre-game, plus half and full-time.
Studio team
Here we need a host and three analysts to provide a solid mix of personality and intellect, so I’m going with:
• Yvonne O’Keefe
• Cooper Cronk
• Peter Sterling
• Michael Ennis
O’Keefe is an unbelievable host. I don’t think people truly realise how hard that job is, but she keeps things moving at just the right pace, and ensures the analysts all get their say at the exact right time.
And we’ve got three good ones here in Cronk, Sterling and Ennis – smart, knowledgeable and with the ability to have opinions without agendas, and without bombastic yelling.
Nightly News Show (Monday to Thursday)
• Lara Pitt
• Andrew Webster
• Plus a range of guests each night
These might be the hardest roles to fill. The host needs to be a rational and sensible professional who ensures the trending topics are covered with strong opinions (including their own), but without the discussion disintegrating into a hot take circus.
And their offsider needs to be unafraid of saying something unpopular, but without resorting to acting like – quite frankly – a dickhead. Pitt and Webby get first go here, and I think they’ll do a great job, but the casting for this one is definitely the trickiest.
‘Lighter’ Studio Show
This show can still tackle the big topics and games, but shouldn’t take itself too seriously, and allow players/guests to come on and enjoy themselves. The Matty Johns Show is just about perfect as it is, so that team should just keep doing do their thing.
Pure Analysis Show
I’m salivating at the prospect of a ‘pure analysis’ show every Wednesday night that expertly breaks down the game, and educates fans on the nuances of tactics, coaching and skill.
Getting a rotating cast of footy’s best brains solely focussed on the intricacies of rugby league, and nothing else, is exactly what the code needs. Can we just make this one happen now, please?
• Peter Sterling
• Cooper Cronk
• Andrew Johns
• Cam Smith
• Greg Alexander
• Gus Gould
• Trent Robinson (plus any and all head coaches)
Hard-Hitting Interview Show
If you want someone who doesn’t care about being popular, will ask the tough questions, and knows more about football – both on the field, and running a team – than almost anyone on the planet, there’s really one person for the job here.
He may have lost his magic in the commentary booth some years ago, but we’ve come full circle. Admit it, he’d been pretty interesting in this role:
• Gus Gould
Phil Gould. (Photo: Tony Feder/Getty Images)
So that’s my team, but I fully admit such things are subjective and we all have our own acquired tastes. I’m also cognisant that I may be overlooking someone talented and obvious who deserves a gig, so by all means correct with me with your own rugby league TV ‘Dream Team’.
Gus O
Roar Rookie
Sterling has been excellent this year, he still has plenty to offer and is a much better communicator than Andrew Johns. Johns can provide insight, but he is repetitive and painful at times. Fittler is excellent and as good as we have on TV for end-of-game interviews.
Ryan V
Guest
Roach on Fox is a shocker low brow, states the bleeding obvious, no insight Ennis and Cronk terrific If I ever ever think of giving up Fox for 9 NRL only, the GF 9 only commentary sealed the deal that 9 is ordinary. BTW why couldnt the NRL deal with Cameron Smith over his match evening up comments as they did with Coach Cleary? He is still a registered player?
Don
Roar Rookie
I believe Fatty has a gig at Nine until he decides he doesn’t want to do anything anymore. I recall reading that after he had that serious head injury whilst doing a segment for the footy show Gyngel had assured him he’d always have a job at the station. It helped that Fatty didn’t take any legal action too.
egbert
Guest
Everyone on Channel 9 is awful except Sterling, Fittler and maybe as an anchor Danika Mason. I really like the on-camera contributions, and the print journalism, of Michael Chammas and would welcome more of him. Obviously Fox are beyond the pale because it's Murdoch, so that's them ruled out.
qwetzen
Roar Rookie
Can't think of any of the current game comms that I rate. Never hear anything new or insightful and a witty, or even original comment is as rare as Donald Trump telling the truth. And then there's the shouting. It's not "passion" as some claim, it's a deliberate tactic to try and generate 'excitement'. My ideal comms would be HG & Roy, with special comments by O'Keefe, Kerry. Forget the rest.
Monkey Fist
Roar Rookie
As a storm supporter, I agreed with Gould, the Panthers did seem right in the match at half time. I thought most of his comments were pretty spot on. It’s Fitler that I find had a real bias against the storm. He almost seems to get upset when they’re winning.
Harvey Wilson
Roar Rookie
Gotta have Roy and HG for the commentary
Mick Gold Coast QLD
Roar Guru
Ryan - fair enough. I have gone back to your piece, re-read your view of Gould and I agree. My comment was directed not at that but at his numerous critics here who were appalled by his bias last weekend - to that I say so what? It has got everyone talking and that is a good thing. Not every commentator is obliged to emulate the exceptional objectivity of Dennis Cometti. The likes of Phil Gould and Ray Warren have a role during the game to entertain and excite. Sterling, Andrews and Fittler are well suited to their role of detailed analysis. After the match Gould's experience, intelligence and wisdom commend him as an outstanding incisive interviewer, yes. I have seen his entire career and he is good at everything he has attempted. His first lucky break was studying and learning well under Warren Ryan, an articulate and educated man whose impact on a young hopeful's life could be profound. :happy: While I am at it - Peter Sterling was exceptional on the paddock like Andrew Johns, but more the conductor managing the symphony, while Johns was as magical as a ninja warrior, appearing from nowhere and - poof! - gone. I enjoy their studied, knowledgeable accounts, still sharp years after they starred. Brad Fittler, like Bradley Clyde, was best appreciated by watching end on. They roved back and forth continually, ever watchful, their eyes looking for opportunity, their brains assessing trends and their swift and confident actions seizing chances which were apparent to them alone. They both, of course, played like this for every minute of every game, they were unrelenting. Fittler has matured impressively and brings a thoughtful, intelligent, reflective quality for us to enjoy. Finally, as a young man Ray Warren set out to be a capable professional and he has achieved that in spades. I say he must retire while that remains the case.
Kick n Clap
Guest
Simple Facts here, Gus did nothing wrong except for coming on the “Panthers bus” to the stadium !! Seriously he was “ bent “ in favour of the Panthers throughout the whole game. I knew what he was getting at, but unfortunately the scoreboard didn’t lie at Halftime or Full time? Channel 9? Simple line up here? Panthers or Roosters on TV. No Gus or Fittler. Fact’s here Too many ties from all of the Ex-pro’s. Newcastle playing - No Joey. Parramatta playing no Sterlo. Bronco’s No ex-Bronco’s. Gus is full of passion for the game. Some times he is spot on, sometimes he away with Fairies!! On this occasion he still had his Panther Blazer on under is Channel 9 one?
Ryan O'Connell
Expert
Exactly. So what a great interviewer he’d make.
matth
Roar Guru
John McCoy was an absolute icon of Brisbane sports calling. 50+ years. The TAB breakfast shoe is a shadow of its former self. Salty has gone as well now.
Mick Gold Coast QLD
Roar Guru
Phil Gould knows more about the game than the collective wisdom here at The Roar and his difference is an essential characteristic to preventing a whole lot of blokes, protecting their image, presenting session after session of fierce agreement about everything.
Mick Gold Coast QLD
Roar Guru
I think you won't see many players with them any more - a decade or two ago the obstetricians began the modern practice of lopping them off at birth.
Dunning Kruger
Roar Rookie
Forgot Billy J Smith for the Dream team. Legend.
Dunning Kruger
Roar Rookie
100% agree on Voss and Smith, by the length of the straight. Fitler, Slater and Ennis for good analysis from a player. Never to be seen again: Ray Warren, Wally Lewis, Ruan Sims.
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
Agree whole heartedly Joe - I like seeing Gal go toe to toe with Gus on 100% Footy - he doesn't back off if he has an opinion contrary to Gus. And a lot of the time he's right. He doesn't mind pulling up Gus if he's got something wrong either. Wasn't a fan of Gal's early in his career when he was a bit of a grub but he has a pretty good understanding of the game and offers some good comments. Also doesn't mind correcting himself is subsequent weeks if he's proven wrong. He seems to have escaped much recognition in the feedback today.
Geoff from Bruce Stadium
Roar Rookie
Maybe playtime as well!
Joe
Roar Rookie
Love Benji as a panelist.
Joe
Roar Rookie
Definitely agree with Slater, Ennis and Cronk as the best analysts. I also like Johns without the Gould. Weirdly I think Gallen and Gould are a decent pair as Gallen doesnt give any ground.
Big Daddy
Guest
HY, One thing for sure Billy's a lot better than his namesake Michael. !!!