Broadside: Stuart’s playing bizarre mind games with Aussies claiming last Ashes didn’t count - ‘a void series’

Stuart Broad is reviving his role as Ashes pantomime villain by claiming he doesn’t count the 4-0 flogging England copped in the last series in Australia as a real series. 

The history books say otherwise. And the Wisden editors are pretty unlikely to pulp its original 2022 Almanack for am updated Broad version.

With the start of the Ashes series 50 days away, Broad marked the occasion at a publicity opportunity for Marmite (the lesser version of Vegemite, that’s all you need to know) by writing off England’s thrashing on the last tour Down Under as “a void series.”

In a typically provocative interview with The UK Daily Mail, he also tried to plant a few seeds of doubt in the minds of the Australian players about what to expect when they come up against Bazball for the first time.

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“In my mind I don’t class that as a real Ashes,” he said in a bizarre explanation when asked about the 2021-22 capitulation. 

Stuart Broad appeals unsuccessfully for a wicket in the “void series” of the Ashes in 2021-22. (Photo by Quinn Rooney/Getty Images)

“The definition of Ashes cricket is elite sport with lots of passion and players at the top of their game. Nothing about that series was high level performance because of the Covid restrictions. The training facilities, the travel, not being able to socialise. I’ve written it off as a void series.”

That humiliation, followed by the 1-0 series defeat in the Caribbean to the West Indies, triggered seismic change in England’s cricket set-up with captain Joe Root, coach Chris Silverwood and team director Ashley Giles jumping ship or being pushed, replaced by Ben Stokes, Brendon McCullum and Rob Key to kick off the Bazball revolution.

From winning a paltry one Test in 17 starts, England have smashed their way to a 10-2 record under McCullum’s high-octane style to ensure the upcoming Ashes series will be the most anticipated contest since the famous 2005 cliffhanger when it gets underway at Edgbaston on June 16.

If the Australians proceed with their plan to stick with struggling opener David Warner, it will be music to Broad’s ears after he dismissed him seven times during the Australian left-hander’s 2019 nadir of 95 runs from 10 innings.

But the veteran seamer did not focus on one particular opponent as he tried to stoke the fears of the Australians as they prepare to play in a country where they have not beaten England in a series since 2001.

Stuart Broad falls flat on his face in Hobart in 2022. (Photo by Matt Roberts – CA/Cricket Australia via Getty Images)

“It’s going to be a slight clash of styles and I’m fascinated to see how their bowling attack will defend against us. And it will be interesting to see how their batters stay calm because we play so aggressively now. Will they be able stick to their game plans and bubbles when we’re playing this style? That will be a test for them,” he said.

“I think it would be great for us if Australia try to take us on at our own game. If we can get them playing in a slightly different style they could make mistakes and that would be brilliant for us. Steve Smith, Marnus Labuschagne and Usman Khawaja are all guys who like to bat time and accumulate so if we can nibble away at them and just get them thinking ‘why are we not scoring quicker? Why are we not moving the game forward?’.”

Broad famously, or infamously if you have green and gold pedigree, enraged not only the Australian team but the nation itself in the first 2013 Ashes Test when he refused to walk after Michael Clarke claimed an obvious catch at slip after the Englishman had nicked an Ashton Agar delivery.

It was more than somewhat hypocritical for the tourists to whinge about Broad’s lack of sportsmanship when very few Australians would have given themselves up in the same situation. 

It was a howler from umpire Aleem Dar – he thought the deviation wasn’t off the bat but from the gloves of keeper Brad Haddin before Clarke pouched it.

He made a bad decision but so did the Australians when they burned their last review prior to the incident. Sound familiar?

When he wasn’t playing agent provocateur in his incendiary interview, Broad said he was genuinely hoping for a closely fought series along the lines of the 2005 epic which England won 2-1 to reclaim the Ashes for the first time in nearly two decades.

Broad’s comments are the latest in what will be a series of pre-Ashes pot shots between cricket’s oldest enemies in the lead-up to the first Test.

Stokes recently declared he wanted the groundstaff at the five venues to prepare “fast, flat pitches” to suit their uber-aggressive style.

Former England captain Michael Vaughan has been throwing fuel on the fire via Twitter, claiming the Aussies have very little batting waiting in the wings when Warner and Smith retire. 

His former skipper, Mike Atherton, in his more understated way, has written in his Times columns that the baggy green batters are “homesick travellers, happiest against Kookaburra balls on flat pitches, and far less certain when conditions offer swing, seam or spin” and that “a moving ball is like kryptonite to Australian batsmen”. 

Pat Cummins and the Australian camp have been conspicuous by their relative silence in comparison. 

It’s a smart tactic. If they arc up in response then the “ugly Australians” accusations will fly thick and fast their way and any inflammatory comments will be used as motivation by the English side.

Not to mention that quotes last longer than the 24-hour “newspaper to fish and chip wrapping” cycle of the distant past. The English media in particular will take great delight in rehashing any cocky pre-Ashes quotes if the Aussies go down in the series. 

Chief selector George Bailey didn’t give much away in last week’s team announcement about their thoughts on England but seemed uncharacteristically irritated in his video media conference by any suggestion that Australia might fear Stokes’ side or that they would have to alter their tactics in the face of the Bazball onslaught.

Glenn McGrath. (Hamish Blair/ALLSPORT)

But of course the pre-Ashes slanging match was officially inaugurated a few weeks ago when Glenn McGrath made his traditional 5-0 prediction for Australia to really set Pigeon among the cats. 

Although this time around he added “I’m not going to ever say anything else, am I? I might be being a bit tongue-in-cheek”. Unusual for him to even give the slightest of ground, which shows the collective Australian swagger is not as bulletproof as it once was.

Broad has pretty much become the modern version of McGrath – even though few would admit it, deep down many Australian fans actually respect the brash English seamer and may even just like him.