Did anybody really want another season of AFLX?
I’m so annoyed that AFLX is back that I swore through this entire piece. But of course this is a public site, so I can’t swear, no matter how annoyed I get. Instead I’ve gone through the article and replaced all my profanity with antiquated cursing that’s acceptable nowadays.
Golly, I am so tired of the AFL screwing with our game.
What is the point of this cockadoodie game? Who is this bollocks of a game pitched at? Who’ll watch this bastardised poo and decide, “Hey, I’m going to give Australian Rules a try?”.
Gadzooks, people who love Australian Rules are, well, following Australian Rules. People overseas would watch this reconstituted bullcrap and then be unable to reconcile why it’s so unlike actual Australian Rules. How do you win people over by pitching a caricature?
Gosh darnit to heck, the AFL’s obviously watched T20 and thought, “Hey, we should have our own shortened, juiced-up game”. They’ve watched the Big Bash League and thought, “Let’s have our own competition just like that – no existing clubs, new franchises, blah blah blah”.
T20 is one of the shortest recognised versions of cricket, but the rules of the game are unchanged with the exception of the length of each match. Runs are still scored by the batsmen running. Hitting the boundary still equals four runs. Hitting the ball over the boundary still equals six runs. Overs are still six balls long. Dismissals are all still the same. Teams are still made up of 11 players each.
The rules, consarn it, are the same.
But AFL eXcrement? What flippin’ insanity went on to tar the game we love with these inconsistent, incomprehensible and irreconcilable rules that amount to one stunning clusterbug?
This is the AFL goubermouching where they shouldn’t, pumping time, money and energy into this dang fruitless cause. Jeez Louise, AFLX is a waste of darn tootin’ resources. And while the game has been designed to be freestyling basketball without the physicality, if one of the players from the team I support is injured in this meaningless claptrap – zounds! I will toss a glitter bomb at the AFL’s doorstep.
(Michael Willson/AFL Media/Getty Images)
I understand the underlying motivation is to promote Australian Rules, but this cheeser is like using badminton to promote tennis. With this I mean no disrespect to badminton. This example is to demonstrate that outside of basic similarities – players swing racquets, there’s a court, there’s a net and there’s an object they hit back and forth – you can’t use one sport to promote the other.
Thunderation, I hope this is only intended as a muckspout promotion and not the intended foundation of some heavens to Betsy rantallion offshoot, because all it will do is bescumber the game we’ve known and loved for over a century.
Hells bells, it’s like cretins who claim the media doorstopping footballers or barging into the rooms for interviews is good entertainment for promoting the game. Yikes! How dadgummit many kids out there are being converted to Australian Rules because Brian Taylor accosts some player who doesn’t want to be interviewed? Or because some media personality harangues an injured player? Or some blasted panel chats casually and obliviously while a team is running through handball drills behind them?
Great Caesar’s ghost, this is all to simply say that the damned focus is wrong. AFLX is just a disaster of unrelenting proportions.
You want to promote the fudging game? Put more tooting time and energy into players making appearances at schools and football clinics. Promote the AFLW further and let the teams consolidate rather than expanding when the talent pool currently doesn’t exist to support expansion.
Jeez, if you want to have some preseason competition that’s meant to drive engagement and convert agnostics and atheists, how about the creation of an AFL-sanctioned junior competition? Imagine 13 to 15-year-olds having the honour of representing an AFL brand and given national coverage. Imagine seeing the stars of the near future play. Imagine how the next generation would aspire to be involved.
But this excrement awash on the hopefulness of a new year? AFL, please fug it off.
Gary
Roar Rookie
AFLW isn't breaking even yet, but the cost for not having this comp would be greater in the long run... why do you think they started this? Surely you must acknowledge the incredible publicity and goodwill AFLW has already generated for the AFL and aussie rules in general? Don't get me wrong, the AFL is capable of butchering the AFLW... too many teams in Vic next year for starters.
Penster
Roar Guru
He also deserves credit for denying fans the opportunity to see their teams play in Australia.
Martin
Roar Rookie
The China matches did have a big TV audience so I wouldn't knock those two matches. Gil does deserve credit for this.
Graeme
Guest
TOTALLY agree. The AFL seem destined to STUFF up the game. They should do away with this crap. And each team should play each other TWICE. Other wise the draw is unfair.
Rob
Guest
Didnt hate the idea of AFLX last year. Didnt really love it either tho. But I watched it. I wont be watching this year though as i have no team - same reason i stopped watching t20 when they scrapped the state based comp for this scorchers, stars, sixes crap.
Larry1950
Guest
As a league fan who watches and enjoys AFL on and off, I cannot for the life of me see the sense in AFLX. Just wait until one of the players sustains a serious injury & see the clubs consigning this pointless game to the bin forever. Why not actually promote the AFLW properly, it's at least a genuine version of your game. They obviously got their lead from American basketball & gridiron where they play those "all star" games before the grand finals (whatever the title of those games may be).
Jakarta Fan
Roar Rookie
I love AFL footy. Didn't mind AFLX as a pre-season club-team game but don't like this pick-up format. I do understand the AFL's marketing need to find a morm of the game to fit into soccer fields as nearly everywhere in the world there are no ovals big enough for normal AFL. That's the only reason I give AFLX some support as to get into the international arena you need small grounds.
Peter the Scribe
Roar Guru
This is such a circus pantomime you just wait for one side allowing the other back into the game if it's not close enough. It feels scripted and another bad idea from the CEO who makes decisions on the fly.
IAP
Guest
The China matches is the second most ridiculous thing the AFL has done, behind AFLX. Both on Gil's watch.
Penster
Roar Guru
China is full of soccer grounds, my first thought is that the AFL wants a piece of that market, the Port Adelaide v Gold Coast matches having been a resounding success ????
mds1970
Roar Guru
The idea of developing a shortened rectangular form of the game has merit. And I don't mind the idea of having a bit of hit-and-giggle to start the pre-season, similar to rugby 7s. But AFLX has lost the plot. Too many stupid gimmicks, it's a ridiculous joke. And with every sporting event, the fans want someone to win. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. But who cares who wins this? Is anyone going to support any team in this?
Mister Football
Roar Guru
I don't think one day constitutes a "season"
IAP
Guest
I believe a rectangular oval is actually a rectangle. Don’t quote me though...
IAP
Guest
When people call footy a “product” it’s lost it’s heart and soul. The AFL doesn’t prioritise AFLW over AFLX because of money. Footy is always about money for the AFL, and the AFLW is a cost to it, not a revenue generator.
Col from Brissie
Roar Guru
Disagree about the rules being standard throughout all forms. In One-day cricket bowlers can’t bowl wide of the leg stump or it’s called a wide. They also can’t bowl bouncers where the ball is over shoulder height. If they bowl a no-ball the batsman gets a free hit. There are also field restrictions in the limited overs games. In the shorter versions of the game batsmen certainly are better off.
Dexter The Hamster
Roar Rookie
By golly, that was a tough article to get through. But please..... Its not "screwing with the game". Its a one off, made for TV, night of entertainment. Take it as it is, or don't. Maybe you are not the intended target market for it. Go and do something else that night. Relax. Netflix and chill. I wont be arranging my life around it as I might the Grand Final, but if I'm home, I'll be watching. Some pretty good players involved, less chance of injury than a training session (did you see last years AFLX?), and just a bit of competitive fun. Can we not just enjoy anything anymore in this world??
Gary
Roar Rookie
Why would you introduce a competing product to go against the AFLW? Why doesn't the AFL put everything into the Women's comp? there is no tribalism in AFLX, in fact no interest at all... perhaps the AFL board think the youth market only responds to daft temporary spectacles. If anything, AFLX dimishes brand value of everyone involved. AFLW improves brand value for the AFL organisation, why undermine it with such a ludicrous exercise?
Les Zig
Roar Guru
But they're all 6 now, aren't they? Importantly, even though Test cricket spawned One-Day cricket, and now T20, the rules have remained standard throughout all three forms.
Brendon the 1st
Roar Rookie
It is a big joke, however, the idea to find a game that can be played on a rectangular oval is a smart one. This game is just so far off what that game should look like it's ridiculous, team deadly.......c'mon. Wouldn't worry about injuries to much, training is harder on the body than this rubbish.
Col from Brissie
Roar Guru
In England overs were initially 4 balls, then 5, then 6 then 8 and changed back to 6 in 1946. In Australia they were 4, 6, 8 back to 6 then back to 8 and finally back to 6 in 1979.