An out-of-pocket punter comes up with a fundamental reason why the game they play in heaven doesn’t get more free-to-air coverage.
Question: “Why was that a penalty?”
Answer: “Well, you see, when you get tackled, you must release the ball. That guy didn’t release the ball.”
Q: “Why was that one a penalty?”
A: “Well, you see, when the tackler has brought the ball carrier to the ground, he’s supposed to let go of him. But he didn’t let go of him in time.”
Q: “Well, why was that just a penalty?”
A: “Because, you see, in that scenario, both sets of players committed simultaneous infringements at the same breakdown.”
Game over. Final score: 6-3.
Q: “So if they’re all doing something wrong at the same time, then why’d the penalty go to team A instead of team B?”
A: “I don’t know.”
Echoing somewhere up in the commentary box, “From a technical perspective, you could say the visitors were very unlucky tonight. Some of those calls really could have gone either way…”