Suggestions for the Channel Nine commentary team

 
Steve Kaless Roar Guru

By , 17 Apr 2009 Steve Kaless is a Roar Guru

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Jamie Soward and Dean Young during the NRL, Round 4, Brisbane Broncos v St George Illawarra Dragons match at Suncorp Stadium in Brisbane, Friday April 3, 2009. Dragons won 25-12. (AAP Image/Action Photographics, Colin Whelan)

Jamie Soward and Dean Young during the NRL, Round 4, Brisbane Broncos v St George Illawarra Dragons match at Suncorp Stadium in Brisbane, Friday April 3, 2009. Dragons won 25-12. (AAP Image/Action Photographics, Colin Whelan)

I’m no expert on rugby league commentary, so it’s only when I’m positive I have some good ideas that I would pop something in the suggestion box for the “voice of rugby league” and the “super coach.”

Now, I love a punt as much as the next man. But I’m finding it hard to define the demarcation between watching sport and betting on sport when the commentators are constantly bombarding us with figures about how much people are wagering on the fixture we are viewing.

In short, I find it a bit off.

I know the TAB have probably handed over a considerable amount of cash for the privilege, but having Ray Warren and Phil Gould (two gentleman who have a reputation in betting circles for giving their own considerable amount of cash back to the TAB) getting more excited about the exploits of punters than the athletes on show, is getting a bit much.

In these leaner economic times, when people are losing their jobs, do you really want to be hearing that some bloke has just wagered a cheeky fifty grand on a football match? Especially if you’re tucking into a cut price six pack to make ends meet.

But more importantly, I’d like to hear the full story.

Gus and Rabs are big on saying at half time, as they did on Friday: “A punter has just bet thirty thousand on the Eels, you’ve got to say they are looking good.”

What about an update that tells a truer picture of gambling?

Here are a few suggestions: “That bloke who backed the Eels, is probably crying himself to sleep in a darkened corner of the room tonight.”

Or something more festive:

“Oh, Parra, with a 4.5 points start they said. There will be no presents under the tree at Christmas this year!”

Or one for the family men:

“And if you made a call at halftime to TAB Sportsbet to back the Eels, you better start thinking of what to tell the wife because Wendell Sailor has just crushed the Eels defence, and your monthly budget.”

And if they were really getting in the spirit of things, then they should announce to the mug punter that while TAB Sportsbet may have one price, you can probably get anywhere up to a twenty percent improvement by shopping around.

Finally, when they roll off the stats about the big dollars being laid on various teams, they should also announce the disclaimer that if the TAB get a sniff that you might have anything close to a clue, they’ll be unlikely to want to accept your big wager.

Only fools need apply.

In the end, it is worth remembering that all that money to sponsor television broadcasts didn’t come from paying out winning tickets.

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