2010: I had been acutely aware of the dwindling financial resources of the Australian Rugby Union for several years; it deeply concerned me.
I began imagining a post-apocalyptic world without rugby union, destitute ex-players living in wheelie bins; vacant-eyed former fans filling bingo halls or wanly staring through security fences watching holes being dug at building sites to pass the empty time during the cold winter months.
I began thinking about ways, outside of television rights and gate receipts, to generate large volumes of money to not only keep our precious game afloat but also to increase its presence in this country.
I ran through a list of potential money spinners: loan sharking, armed robbery, prostitution, drug dealing as well as allied japes like merchant banking and dentistry, but none seemed to quite fit.
I then had a serious light bulb moment – eureka!
Excited, I immediately sent an email (note the date) to the ARU’s John O’Neill which read in part:
Date: 27 June 2010 16:29
Dear Mr O’Neill
… I have a simple idea that combines animation (by bringing Wally the mascot to life with animation) and a powerful chant-of-support that can be performed en masse by Australian spectators at Wallaby games here and possibly overseas.
Call it an intimidating and stirring riposte to the haka if you like, at least with regard to games against New Zealand. But it can be employed during any game against anyone.
And Wally could the vehicle for it. With respect, I believe he is being under-utilised by the ARU. At the moment we have nothing, unless you consider Waltzing Matilda puts the fear of God into opposing teams.
I believe that if the idea is brought to life through Wally, there could be significant financial spin-offs in this. Significant.’
By way of explanation, I should say here that I am a highly experienced animation film writer with some 35 produced films to my credit, including Blinky Bill. I saw potential parallels between Blinky and Wally.
When I got hold of Blinky he was a book character only; it was my job to turn him into a popular movie star and I believe my screenplay achieved that. I actually judged Wally, who joined the Wallabies in 1924, to have more potential given the fact that he was a fast-moving running animal not a tree-bound one.
By donning a magic rugby jumper he could have an alter ego and become a super hero capable of amazing feats, not least on the rugby field. And he could have female counterpart, Wallimena, who would inspire girls to take up or support rugby union.
If Pokémon could do it, so could Wally: movies, television programs, games and soft toys. Moreover, the name Wally had already been widely promoted by the Where’s Wally book publishers. Even better, the I later learned that the ARU had wisely patented the Wally name. Moreover, Wally already has a presence on television when cameras cut to him on the side line during test matches.
To his credit, O’Neill responded promptly; he obviously liked the idea. A meeting was set up here in Adelaide, where I live, with the ARU’s marketing manager Matt Brand (great name for a marketing man!). He really liked the idea. It was at this meeting that Matt informed me (to my pleasant surprise) that the clever SARU was already doing something along these lines with Bokkie, the Springbok mascot.
They had commissioned a short film featuring Bokkie and put it in cinemas all around South Africa and people were loving it. Rightly so.
I then set about writing a short but, in my humble (did he say ‘humble’?) view, better movie featuring Wally. Within the screenplay I wrote a potential crowd chant and sent it to a very clever composer who turned it into this:
Fired up, I then took a leading animation director and a producer to a meeting with Brand at the ARU in St Leonards where Matt announced he was leaving and would be replaced by journalist Peter Jenkins.
Start again, Leonard.
Peter set a meeting for November 4, 2010. I again flew in from Adelaide, again at my own expense. The meeting was scheduled to last only half-an-hour but because he was extraordinarily busy I managed only a few minutes with him, maybe 15. And achieved very little. Then O’Neill left and was replaced by Bill Pulver!
Start again, Leonard.
I wrote to Bill with a background brief saying I would have one last crack at this. He too responded positively and invited me to a meeting in April 2013. Interestingly, while I was sitting downstairs at the ARU headquarters, my hero Robbie Deans wandered by so I introduced myself and he kindly escorted me up to Bill’s office and sat in on the meeting.
You develop a sense for these things and I left feeling the meeting had been highly positive.
But still nothing happened. And then Peter Jenkins left the ARU…
Start yet again, Leonard!
I was then invited by Bill to come back to Sydney to meeting with Peter’s replacement, Rachel Hickey. It was scheduled for August 6, 2013. This time I flew in from Darwin, where I’d been staying, courtesy a ticket from my beloved, generous, rugby-loving grandson, Costa (I am an pensioner and an impoverished writer after all!); we felt the meeting was too important to conduct by Skype as had been suggested.
Now look, Bill Pulver is a nice man and Rachel Hickey is a lovely woman (with whom it turned out I had a family connection). I make it clear that I am not, unlike some notable others, calling for Bill Pulver’s head here either but I began sensing that I had explained my idea so poorly that Bill had not quite ‘got it.’
He thought, in the Wally crowd chant, I was trying to create an Australia haka which was not the case. And when I started projecting potential figures for Wally’s box office and merchandising revenue I got the feeling he thought he was in the presence of the delusional.
Fair enough, I guess; Bill has a background in IT(echnology) while mine is IM(agination). We each do what we do – and perhaps ne’er the twain shall meet.
In March 2014 the ARU appointed a new Marketing Manager, David Low, who I was informed would take over the Wally Project thenceforth with.
Yep, I started again; I am a pathologically patient man.
To cut a long story short, I have not heard from Bill, Rachel and David for quite some time now. I recently sent them another gentle ‘remember me?’ email to inform them I was not dead, but there was no reply this time. In fairness to the ARU, I must state here that I was eventually paid a modest ex gratia sum for creating the nice Wally screenplay. But what does stick in my craw is that the composer of the wonderful Wally crowd chant, Russell Thornton, and the two great young kids who provided some of the vocals gratis for it have still not, at last check, received the test tickets and ARU rugby paraphernalia they were promised by Peter Jenkins all that time ago.
Not good enough, especially where kids are involved.
I have written this (a) to get a few things off my chest and (b) in the hope that some far-sighted, rugby loving business organisation might step up to the plate and get behind my idea before I shuffle this mortal coil. That would be a vindication of it and is probably the only way to breathe life into my Wally of an idea. I feel the idea was always held back because of the perception it might cost the ARU a lot of money which was never my intention.
Any takers?
Leonard Lee is also an author (The Zilch! Factor) and an award-winning documentary maker (A Question of Prejudice).
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