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Pulling a hammy: did Pup dog it?

bshine11 new author
Roar Rookie
21st December, 2012
29

Let’s set the scene. It’s day four in the Australia-Sri Lanka Test in Hobart. The Apple Isle has really put on a show today, it’s typically cold and damp and a bumper crowd of 300 have obligingly turned out for the spectacle.

Australia is batting and busy constructing a sizeable lead. With another Sri Lankan innings still to come, they are looking to score quick runs.

Michael Clarke arrives at the crease and makes a quick-fire 57 off 46 deliveries. He clearly remembered to bring his superb form when crossing the Bass Strait.

But with wickets going cheaply, tragedy strikes! Our brave Captain is struck down by a hamstring ‘tweak’ and is forced to retire hurt.

The bottom order adds a couple more runs and Australia is bowled out for 278.

As Sri Lanka come out to bat, the injured Michael Clarke heroically takes his place in the field and after a long day five, Clarke’s charges go on to win the match.

In the post-match wash-up it becomes clear that Clarke’s hamstring injury is less severe than first expected, and with eight days turnaround until the Boxing Day Test in Melbourne, word coming from the Australian camp is that he is likely to be fit.

And while the Australian public rejoices at the news Shane Watson will not be our captain, the cynical among us collectively raise our right eyebrows an inch and shoot out an inquisitive grimace.

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Did Clarkey fake a hammy to protect his average?

On the surface it adds up.

There’s the motivation. With multiple centuries (include two doubles and a triple) and an average of more than 100, Michael Clarke was clearly in the form of his life entering the Hobart Test.

After scoring 74 in his first innings, Clarke needed at least 68 runs in the second, or not be dismissed, in order to join the exalted group of Bradman, Sobers and Ponting as the only players to have scored more than 1,000 Test runs in a calendar year while also averaging more than 100.

In retiring hurt (and therefore failing to be dismissed) in his second innings, Clarke’s average was not only protected, it received a boost (the ‘retired hurt’ next to his name effectively reducing the number of dismissals when determining his batting average).

Adding further fuel to the conspiracy, Clarke’s performance in the Hobart Test saw him reach another statistical peak – being named the number one ranked Test batsman in the world.

There’s also the performance. On day five, Clarke dived quickly and freely to his right to claim a ‘classic catch’. Hardly the movement you expect from someone suffering from a pulled hamstring.

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And, as anyone who has fielded in the slips will tell you, squatting in situ for four sessions certainly puts a load on the old hammies.

As someone who has experience in this field – having shamefully pulled a fake hamstring injury at the 200m mark of the under-17 400m area heat, upon realising I was going to be severely beaten by superior athletes – I am not one to judge MJ Clarke.

But the Australian public may not be as sympathetic. Because they know as well as anyone that the old maxim rings true: if you dog it, you’re a dog.

Methinks young Michael would much prefer his old sobriquet, Pup.

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