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With St George coach Steve Price submitting a proposal to drastically change tackling rules and the likelihood of major changes to the structure of the salary cap being considered, the NRL may be on the verge of the largest revamp since Super League.
But where will it lead us?
After reviewing data and liaising with NRL futurologists, I have compiled a list of likely scenarios for the future of our beloved game.
Here is what rugby league will look like in the year 2018:
• The NRL will be replaced by the Australian National Union of Rugbies and will comprise nine teams: the Brisbane Broncos, Canterbury Bulldogs, Sydney Roosters, South Sydney Rabbitohs, Perth Tiger Sharks, Greater Western Sydney Gorillas, Southern Dragons (made up of clubs formerly known as the Melbourne Storm, Canberra Raiders, New Zealand Warriors, ACT Brumbies, Melbourne Rebels and St George Illawarra Dragons and will represent everywhere south of Sydney but play out of Kogarah and wear a white uniform with a Red V), NSW Waratahs, and North Queensland Red Cows.
• The State of Origin teams will be the Australian Blues and the Australian Maroons and players will be selected in an annual lottery, playing for whichever team wants them. Players will not have to be Australian. The Blues will still be searching for a series win.
• Channel Ten will show the Brisbane Broncos’ Friday night game each week and the rest of the games will be on Foxtel at $25 a pop.
• The Australian team will be called the Wallaroos and be coached by Cameron Smith. They will play the All Blacks for the Bledisloe Cup and win 50% of the time.
• Anthony Milford will sign to play ruck rover for the Sydney Swans for $7 million a game, citing his son’s medical condition. His son will play for the Sydney Swans, Brisbane Broncos and Sydney FC when he is an adult.
• Blake Ferguson will get out of jail and launch a comeback for the Sydney Roosters. He will captain Australia on their spring tour of Europe.
• Ray Warren will retire. Channel Ten will play recordings of his commentary over matches where they will be only slightly less relevant than they were the first time.
• Phil Gould will retire. No one will notice for three rounds.
• Darius Boyd will take over as lead ANUR commentator. He will be the best commentator ever.
• There will be 17 on-field referees, cameras on the players, ball, refs and goal-posts, and a panel of tertiary-trained video judges in the review box. Fans will lament the number of terrible refereeing decisions made.
• The Roosters will sign LeBron James during the pre-season, matching his NBA contract, but still somehow fit him under the salary cap.
• Parramatta will come last, even though they are no longer in the competition.
• ASADA will release the results of the 2013 peptide inquiry. Six teams will be found to have intentionally implemented an illegal drug system. No team will be penalised but Sandor Earl will be located in southern Japan, where he is playing semi-professional volleyball and modelling, and charged. His mum will successfully defend him in court.
• George Rose will win The Biggest Loser – Celebrity Edition. The following year he will weigh 145kg.
• It will be revealed that Greg Inglis is a robot created by NASA as an experiment. NASA will also admit to using the spare bits left over from creating the GI robot to make Chris Sandow.
• Petero Civeniceva will retire. He will make a comeback the following year.
• Darren Lockyer will reveal he was faking that voice the whole time.
• Not one single player will be in trouble with the police the whole season. Just joking.
• David ‘The Wolfman’ Williams will walk down the street for the first time without someone reminding him of his 2013 grand-final shocker. He will then drop a bomb leading to a Roosters try.
• Every recorded announcement on public transport will be voiced by Sonny Bill Williams.
• Craig Bellamy will lose his 72nd consecutive game as coach of the Southern Dragons. Coincidentally, it will also be the 72nd game since Cooper Cronk, Billy Slater and Cameron Smith retired.
So there it is, the future of rugby league. Did I miss anything?
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