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Five things we now know about the 2014 NRL season

The Knights face a tough task against the Roosters in Sunday afternoon football. (AAP Image/Action Photographics, Renee McKay)
Expert
6th March, 2014
26
1238 Reads

There is always a certain mystique that surrounds an NRL off-season as fans endlessly ponder what will occur in the year to come.

But now that we’ve seen a match, we should all feel free to make some wild assumptions!

Sure, the prudent out there will tell you that you need to watch the entire first round of football before you map out the year and go off half-cocked.

But for this little black duck, I believe I’ve seen enough in 80 minutes to warrant a few certainties for 2014.

The game will be covered like never before

New and exciting ground was broken last night with the introduction of Channel Nine’s “Analyser”, which appeared to be a large screen that you could manipulate – via touch!

I know it’s probably a way off yet, but if anyone could manage to shrink these and make them affordable for the average consumer, I reckon they’d be a big hit.

Elsewhere it was good to see some light comic relief, with a funny-voiced character providing a nonsensical analysis in a clear pro-Roosters introductory segment … you have to love Brad Fittler!

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Rules will be broken. Or ignored. Or misunderstood.

New third man in law?

Yeah, nah, can’t be bothered policing that one.

Shoulder charges?

Only okay if the arm is moved to a position of minimum 23 degrees from the body’s sagittal plane and the defender’s deltoid remains at least adjacent to the coefficient of the hypotenuse.

Or, if the attacker doesn’t get hurt.

Sin bin?

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What is this, the ’80s?

Got to love the NRL referees keeping everyone on their toes (except Luke Phillips) as they ad-lib their way through the rule book, picking and choosing interpretations like your seven-year-old at the Sizzler salad bar.

I’ll go out on a limb and say at some stage this year an NRL coach will voice his displeasure at such perceived refereeing inconsistencies.

Sam Burgess will win a lot of man-of-the-match awards

Whether it’s a last-ditch effort to keep in the game or the selectors just want a nice place to crash in downtown Bath, Burgess looked suitably bemused last night as he took the award from Channel Nine.

But, to be fair, he probably did outplay Sonny Bill Williams.

If last night’s performance was enough to get the nod here’s hoping Burgess can clear some old signs out of the back shed for all the giant novelty cheques.

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Queensland will win the Origin series

No seriously, did you see Greg Inglis out there? And, ahhh, anyone spot any NSW halves?

Souths are certainties for a premiership and Roosters will miss the eight

The rest of the regular season is a mere formality for the “pride of the league” after a scintillating and flawless victory over last year’s lucky premiers.

As for the Roosters?

Bah, may as well start blooding some juniors and trying to salvage what’s left of their season now.

They should ask Phil Gould if he’d like to ditch Penrith for Bondi again.

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Or, maybe they can ask Saints if they’d still like to finally form the Sydney Dragons, never too late y’know.

No seriously, I read it on Twitter last night…

Anyone else out there see something in their crystal ball at full-time?

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