“The choreographed pursuit of kickable penalties.” That is distinguished English rugby commentator Paul Hayward’s elegant definition of what we lesser talents call Whistle Ball, “the game of organising the ref into blowing his whistle within a specific 40 percent or so of the grass.”
Writing in The Guardian, Hayward describes Whistle Ball specialists England as spiritually paralysed.
He goes on to praise “the run, the surge, the feint, the sidestep, the flow of ball from hand to hand.”
Could be an ad for Real Rugby.
Real Rugby, you will know (if paying attention), is the pursuit of tries, conversions and drop goals.
In the 14-game, just-finished season (Tri-Nations, Bledisloe and Spring Tour) Whistle Ball on 303 beat Real Rugby 279.
The 303 came of course from over a century of penalty goals. The 279 was from everything else.
This change of heart by Hayward may have been influenced by the Twickenham booing of England’s all-kicking game.
Or the recent embarrassing defeats of the Whistle Ball experts, England, France and South Africa.
Or perhaps All Blacks coach Graham Henry’s description of Whistle Ball as tennis, his support for the full ELVs, and his proposals to give twenty metres for clean marks and only one point for penalty goals.
Henry has also commented along the general lines that while a city as large as London might produce enough hard-wired Whistle Ball buffs to fill a stadium, the same cannot be said of Auckland and Wellington, let alone the likes of Rotorua, Christchurch and Dunedin, the heartland of the world’s best rugby.
We could probably add most Australian cities.
Henry has also commented along the lines that modern balls (and one might add, modern fitness and training) enable players to boot such massive distances that it has changed the game from its original character.
His current proposals flow in part from the size of grounds inhibiting expansion of the field of play.
The temporary negative entity called Whistle Ball will never kill the permanent positive entity called Real Rugby but it is doing its best.
Exhorting the coaches is not the answer. Changing the laws is.
Join The Roar rugby editor Christy Doran, former Wallaby Matt Toomua and a cast of regular and special guests as they look at the biggest issues in the game on The Roar Rugby Podcast. If you’re looking for great odds on the next game check out Aussie bookmaker PlayUp. Chances are you’re about to lose. Set a deposit limit.
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