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17th November 2008. That was the date I changed my moniker from ‘Bring Back Melon’ to ‘Who Needs Melon’. I can point to the article in which the change occurred, a cracker of a piece by OldManEmu.
It was in the aftermath of a great Wallaby win over Engalnd. At Twickenham on 15th November 2008.
A Wallaby win in which our forwards finally stood up. And our scrum seemingly turned a corner. In fact OldManEmu remarked that “our front three is one that you can build a World Cup year on”. At the time this didn’t seem absurd.
Unfortunately those front three were Robinson (now out injured), Moore (missed due to illness), and Baxter, probably the lesser of the three, who has dropped off since.
My original choice of moniker was no idle whim. I had been despairing for years that we needed a forward with ‘mongrel’ like Owen Finegan (aka ‘Melon’).
I’m sure all long term Wallaby supporters will remember his lumbering run to the try line to win the semi against the French in the 1999 World Cup.
My decision to change to ‘Who Needs Melon’ represented my belief that we’d turned a corner but, as OldManEmu himself signed off with article, “one swallow does not a summer make”.
Watching this World Cup it’s struck me how big, powerful and ‘mongrelish’ so many other teams are in world rugby. England, Argentina, South Africa, Romania, Georgia… Even Canada and the USA!
All our best forwards recently seem to have been quite small – George Smith, Phil Waugh, David Pocock. Horwill is kind of an exception. Are we a nation of small men? I don’t think so. So what’s the problem?
Theory 1: All the best, biggest, most mongrelish men tend towards other sports like AFL or league.
Solution: Poach some. Don’t go for a Lote, Rogers, Wendall or Tahu. Next time we are after a League player, pick the biggest, meanest SOB they’ve got. I know they won’t know the skills needed for scrums, lineouts, and so on, but I think we are also guilty of overcomplicating things.
Theory 2: In Australia, we just don’t rate forwards that much. Our backs are the ones on the posters. The ones that make the highlight reels. Sure, forwards lay the foundation… but when you look at the Opera House, you don’t think about the foundation, do you?
Solution: Change our focus. Set up an academy focused solely on forward play, especially scrummaging. Select and reward the forward of the year, the scrummager of the year. And reward them with interviews, money, whatever.
Theory 3: It’s our competitions – like Super Rugby and limited other domestic competitions – themselves that encourage backs and devalue forwards.
Solution: Perhaps the more local derbies of this new Super format will help. Perhaps the addition of the Argies? A proper, revamped second tier comp? More guys from rural areas seem to help. Men of the land seem a tougher breed – just look to New Zealand.
I’m not writing the Wallabies off. I realise we’re still in this World Cup. But I also know a problem is not going to be fixed unless its existence is acknowledged.
I think it’s time we stopped saying all is well and poured some real resources into fixing this.
Join The Roar rugby editor Christy Doran, former Wallaby Matt Toomua and a cast of regular and special guests as they look at the biggest issues in the game on The Roar Rugby Podcast. If you’re looking for great odds on the next game check out Aussie bookmaker PlayUp. Chances are you’re about to lose. Set a deposit limit.