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Winners this week included players with a weekend off to watch TV; losers included fans doing the same, with only two games on the box. As for the biggest triumph, Juan Antonio Samaranch called it: the winner is Sydney.
Forget proving anything to the rest of the league. Knocking off competition favourites Hawthorn on Friday night was about Sydney showing themselves that they’re back in business.
Three rounds ago they were mooching around down in 13th, doing the footballing version of picking lint out of their belly buttons while watching repeats of The Nanny. This week they showed up early for a job interview wearing a new suit, a pressed shirt, and listening to a Tony Robbins motivational audiobook on their Bluetooth earpiece.
They’ve beaten four teams in a row, including both of last year’s grand finalists, and suddenly they’re back in the top four.
There is plenty more to do – the other wins in that streak were over the bottom two sides – but what matters about Friday is how they won, bringing back their pressure game to disrupt Hawthorn’s confidence and possession monopoly.
Sydney were all over them early, whacking through the first three goals, and the contest could have been finished halfway through the second quarter if not for Lance Franklin missing six chances.
Hawthorn taking the lead in the third would have spelt the end for most sides, but Sydney dragged them back. The other star Swan recruit, Kurt Tippett, pulled out some power marking to end with four goals, while Franklin eventually came good with two. From here, Sydney have a chance at a real season.
Then there are the fellows from near the Great Australian Bight. Two years ago they were Poor Tadelaide, 22 frowny faces taking the field each week like an emoji repository come to life.
Now Port Adelaide have turned it around completely, zooming to the top of the ladder by beating last year’s grand finalist Fremantle. (Being last year’s grand finalist is the most impressive thing Fremantle can claim at present.)
There was a terrific photo floating around on the weekend of Port midfielder Hamish Hartlett tackling Fremantle giant Aaron Sandilands. Hartlett has surely been Photoshopped into miniature; standing next to Sandilands with his arms wrapped around him, he looks like a ring-tailed lemur trying to fell a statue of Saddam Hussein.
The ring-tailed lemur is a large strepsirrhine primate and the most recognized lemur due to its long black and white tail. (Photo: James Elsby/AFL Media)
It was a visual metaphor for this young and inexperienced side trying to take down the rest of the league. The thing is that they’re succeeding. Without comparing quality, the atmosphere around Port’s season reminds me of Geelong’s back in 2007: a team just starting to reach a high standard, recovering from a notable lack of success, building excitement not just with their results but the way they were playing.
All year they spoke of keeping a lid on it, not wanting to expect too much of an untested side. But when the test came the team was ready. Port are a long way from sitting that test, but have shown their class by beating the Cats and now the Dockers, and by the exuberant, confident style in which they’ve done it.
Their last question mark is whether they can beat top sides in Melbourne.
The rest of the abbreviated round involved the meaningless shuffle of mediocre sides beating those slightly below them. West Coast bought some percentage and some time in the top eight, while the Western Bulldogs are officially the best of the worst, moving out of the bottom third.
Apparently Carlton climbing to 13th was enough reason for journos to ask Mick Malthouse about finals, so they could go home to write that Mick isn’t thinking about finals. Just to be clear, Mick is not thinking about finals.
As far as the defeated went, Essendon won like losers on Saturday night, barely scrambling over the basement terror that is Brisbane thanks to a couple of soft 50-metre penalties.
The Lions led on and off in every quarter, and really the Bombers should have done the decent thing and let the poor buggers be. You sort of wanted the AFL to strip more Essendon premiership points just on aesthetics.
St Kilda should be disappointed, missing chance after chance to put pressure on Carlton after an early Blues burst. Greater Western Sydney, meanwhile, wouldn’t have been surprised to lose in Perth, but have followed their early-season high by bombing right down to hang out with Melbourne and Brisbane.
The big losers, though, were Hawthorn and Freo, the former set to drop from top spot to third if Geelong win their game in hand, while Fremantle will drop from the eight if North win theirs.
I brushed off the loss to Geelong in Round 5 as something to sharpen the Hawks’ appetite and screen them from expectation, but twice in eight games is a different story. Other sides will now be much more confident of finding their weakness.
Sure, they were missing some players, but Hawthorn have also enjoyed a few soft contests so far. Their trip to play Port Adelaide after next week’s bye will be one of my most anticipated of the season.
Fremantle, in the meantime, are teetering. Even coach Ross Lyon wrote them off as a bit rubbish after the game, which I’ll say does seem a tad defeatist from the guy you’ve left in charge.
I mean, it’s not encouraging if your furniture mover turns to you and says “Nah, we’ll never get that piano down the stairs intact. Stay tuned for a big splintered mess of ivory and broken hopes. Also that dining table’s too big to go through the doors so we’ll probably just leave it in the back yard and drive off when you’re not around. You paid upfront though, so no worries. Try to keep the rain off the French polish. Ok boys, on we go.”
So far their only decent win this season was over Collingwood in Round 1, when the Magpies were still emerging from their off-season sleeping bags.
Freo have a soft eight rounds to come after playing Geelong this week, and could easily rack up a points tally that has them in the mix. But it won’t do them a lot of good unless they remember how to play against the competition’s better sides.
Just as for Hawthorn, their next game will be the tester.
Oh, and if you were wondering, Mick Malthouse isn’t thinking about finals.