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With Round 14 done and dusted, let’s take a partial view of the dud performances of the weekend’s action.
The highlight of Round 14 had to be big Tony ‘T-Rex’ Williams’ nod to box office smash Now You See Me 2, which stars Harry Potter.
The big rig somehow passed the ball into his left arm, regathered and split the defence in a move that even had the bunker in awe.
Ray and I missed several games this weekend after spending time bunkered down with coach Laurie Daley and Bozo playing darts up at Stockton Caravan Park – using the traditional method of selecting the Game 2 squad.
The selection process involved 19 players we had to choose from on the dart board, pretty much the 17 players selected, along with Boyd Cordner and the seriously unlucky Akuila Uate – who was placed inside the bullseye!
Daley’s controversial selections of Bryce Cartwright and Jack Bird as development players was the only sticking point over the final team make-up of the side which took three minutes to select.
Rumours that Daley was contemplating doing an Alfie Langer and recalling Todd Carney from the UK Super League was put to rest when he revealed he was chasing Chris Sandow, only to be let down when the Man of Steel favourite was listed as a Queenslander.
Ray and I are close to the release of our NRL Stats App, which combines wellbeing with NRL stats. The introduction when the app first opens is from well-known league identity and Zen master, Matt Elliott. We are still working on a name after we learnt NRL Stats had already been taken.
Now to this week’s Round 14 chopping block…
Blake Austin
This will be sure to stir up the passionate Green Machine fans. For all Austin’s running game in attack, his inconsistent movement in the defensive line makes him a passenger when the Raiders are without the Steeden.
Whether it be rushing up in his beige bike pants to make an intercept or holding his ground on the try line, Austin is showing why several other clubs overlooked him for a consistent run in first grade.
It’s true his attacking sidekick Aiden ‘Julius’ Sezer is also suspect in defence, but while the Raiders can score points right across the park, it’s the schoolboy errors in defence that continue to haunt their progress. The more solid Sam Williams might be better suited but I can’t see Ricky Stuart dropping the man with the ungainly gait.
This time last year critics stated he was unlucky to miss Origin selection – had he played Game 3 in 2015 the Blues may have lost by 78! One half-decent season doesn’t make a representative player.
Greg Inglis
It won’t happen but it should. The great man’s lack of intensity in defence was there for all to see on Friday night, and a move to Brisvegas under Uncle Wayne must be all but a done deal.
To have your leader display such a lack of urgency would have annoyed Rusty and to a lesser extent the token coach Madge Maguire. What’s worse is the boy from Kempsey (Macksville to be precise), will look like the Hulk next Wednesday night for his adopted state and all will be forgotten.
Some have said he has played with injury for the best part of 2016, while I suspect he’s carrying a heartilage injury. The Rabbitohs are at the crossroad point of their season and dumping the great man won’t happen.
But time is running out to convince South Sydney fans he has the club at heart and not a move up north to his adopted state.
Greg Eden
Coach Wayne ‘Clint’ Bennett would be having nightmares about the Broncos’ depth. Firstly, young Lachlan Maranta had a Barry Crocker the week before in Auckland and the only thing that kept the Raiders in the contest on Friday night was the performance from the Englishman.
With potential long-term injuries to Jordan Kahu and Jack Reed, the coach is not stacked for choice with readymade replacements. James Roberts has yet to hit the vintage of season 2015 with the Titans, and its obvious where opposition sides are going to run their plays in coming weeks.
Langer will be flat out over the next fortnight working out his positioning for the Broncos’ next match in a fortnight’s time, during his usual 45-minute spell in the defensive line. No doubt he will be running countless drills of his signature karate trip tackle with future incumbents.
I suspect if fit, young Tom Opacic, nephew of The Cars lead singer Ric Opacic (or is that Ocasek?) might come under consideration for a start. I can just see Benny strolling into Red Hill HQ and singing the classic Cars track to young Tom, “Don’t you worry ’bout two left feet, just shake it up!” in a dramatic announcement on his first-grade debut.
Burgess Brothers
I sound like a broken record but the Burgess brother experiment must be disbanded. Sure, George is sidelined at the moment but you’d suspect Sam had written into his contract, ‘my twin brothers will be selected every week, regardless of form’. The number of poor plays per match would drive Mother Teresa to drink if she was a member of the Burrow.
It must be hard for Rabbitohs fans not to feel a sense of fear every time either twin is charging for a hit up or tangled in a tackle with an opponent. The relief at a clean hit up or quick exit from the ruck in defence would be on par with the Australian public’s joy when it was announced Pauline Hanson had made a comeback to politics or for the elder reader, when Toby Mangle’s missing dog Bouncer was found safe and well on Neighbours!
Like headgear, the brothers could make a killing in endorsements if they donned Kareem Abdul-Jabbar-like prescription goggles for the rest of their NRL careers, if, as I suspect, they have fair to poor eyesight.
Daniel Tupou
The former Origin winger made his opponent, with all of nine games experience playing rugby league under his belt, look like a seasoned pro last Saturday night. Tupou was caught out on several occasions in the ‘Bermuda triangle’ zone in defence – within touching distant of inside centre and making a triangle with the opposition ball carrier.
Tupou is still a target for well-drilled sides that can sniff out a player’s bad habits in a flash and it was exploited more than young Bob Irwin. Sure, overall the whole side looked listless and tired, but the winger’s penchant for rushing in marking nothing but thin air did not help his side’s plight.
Quite possibly the fixture before may have made the Chooks leg weary, but then again it didn’t affect the Wests Tigers. A meeting with Rip Taylor on Tuesday is on the cards for the tall Roosters wing-three-quarter.
So fellow Roarers who made your skin crawl this weekend and why?
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