Michael Schumacher at the 2010 Australian Formula One Grand Prix at Albert Park
Well, we’re all set for another Formula One season, and it all starts this weekend at the Adelaide Grand Prix in Melbourne (herein otherwise known by the clever acronym AGPIM).
My main reason for believing F1 still matters is hearing that Jensen Button drove his McLaren Mercedes around the Mount Panorama circuit at Bathurst earlier this week, before Craig Lowndes did likewise. It’s the mix of makes – or constructors as they call it at this level – that still intrigues.
Watching a Merc sweep across the Mountain was a powerful statement about the prestige of the Formula Uno class and why it remains unique (and to some, a touch above) compared to the V8 Supercars Championship.
Would there be a point in having a constructors’ title in the V8 competition? Ford, Holden, Ford, Holden… hmm… probably not.
So, the chance to assess the potential reliability (or unreliability as the case may be) of more than two types of car is one reason. But not the only one.
Then there’s the drivers themselves. As German electronic music pioneers Kraftwerk would put it, they become ‘man-machines’. Fused with the fibreglass shell of their vehicles in a contest based purely on speed. In a way, that’s part of the continued primal thrill of Formula One racing – it’s all about going as fast as you can.
Humans in control of such sheer speed. There’s another reason.
Assuming the international feed is taken for the commentary, there will also be a new voice alongside Martin Brundle in the BBC box this year. David Coulthard makes it an all-driver team at the microphone.
Brundle’s expecting it to be fun.
“We know each other well, we’ve attended 700 races, driven in more than 400 – so we know a bit,” he told London’s Daily Mail on February 14.
Coulthard replaces Jonathan Legard, who followed in the big-shoe footsteps of James Allan and Murray Walker – never an easy task.
Brundle said he was even expecting to continue to do a few pre-race grid-walk roamings.
“It’s my signature if you like,” he told the Mail.
“Speaking to Sebastian Vettel, for example, to minutes before he pulls his crash helmet on and then went out and won the world title. You can’t do that at Wembley, you can’t do that at Wimbledon, you can’t do that anywhere else.”
According to Brundle, it’s all about adding to the viewer’s race-day experience from their armchair perspective. “Fundamentally, I like talking to the drivers,” he said.
“They always come out with interesting stuff and you can read their faces and their body language. Jensen Button will have a joke, and I just think it’s amazing that they are about to jump into an F1 car and they’re happy to be larking about on the grid.”
Coulthard agreed – with one proviso.
“I had no issue with certain members of the media speaking to me on the grid,” he said.
“As long as I had time to go to the bathroom.”
So, televisual drama. There’s another.
And back-to-back AGPIM winner Button brings me to yet more. I’m sorry, but I’ve always wanted to say this – seriously, does anyone else ever think that when Button has his helmet off it looks as if Coldplay frontman Chris Martin has actually hijacked his driving suit?
If Button wins, it’ll be recorded as having been done at the “Speed Of Sound”. If he loses, blame it on “A Rush Of Blood To The Head”, presumably. And/or picking up a “Yellow” at some point in the race. Though at least he has “Lovers In Japan”. Well, one (model Jessica Michibata).
He’s even got the whole care-for-Earth thing down pat.
“In the past, I’d always travelled to Melbourne full of positive energy and enthusiasm, but at the moment, my heart is with the people of Japan as they struggle to come to terms with the scope of the terrible devastation and loss of life wreaked by the earthquake and tsunami,” Button told the Daily Mirror‘s Byron Young on March 18.
“While the prospect of a Formula One race seems to pale in the face of such a disaster, there have been occasions before when the healing power of sport can actually be beneficial, an escape for people. So I go to Melbourne this weekend resolving to not only try my best but also to salute the brave people, and my many friends, throughout Japan.”
Finally, there’s Australia’s Mark Webber, a man who told Don McRae (at The Guardian) that “words are dangerous” and “it’s hard to be honest” in the sport. McLaren’s Lewis Hamilton had better take note of that then (more later).
“We have to be much more careful,” Webber said.
“You want to be more open and give the public a real snapshot – but you can get into trouble… My gut says we should take things head-on and deal with the consequences later. Emotionally, I usually go back to my default position and say what I feel is right.”
At the moment – or until he wins the AGPIM – Webber seems to be given that same um-er lip-service generic sports fans like to pay to Harry Kewell or Mark Philippoussis – we appreciate the effort but can’t fathom why he keeps under-performing.
A bit like the Aussie basketball team, really. At least he tells the truth and speaks his mind, which is a start. Watch out Vettel. “Honest Mark” is on your tail. Er, driver-adjustable rear wing.
As Hamilton told The Guardian‘s Paul Weaver on March 21, Red Bull, the team of current champion Vettel, is not a “pure-bred racing team.”
“They are not a manufacturer – they are a drinks company… It’s a drinks company versus McLaren and Ferrari’s history,” Hamilton added.
In the end, Hamilton is right, up to a certain point anyway. And so are Webber, Brundle, Coulthard, Kraftwerk and Chris Martin.
“Never an honest word – that was when I ruled the world,” as Coldplay would say.
So, the AGPIM and Formula One in 2011. It’s not just about the sponsors, the commercials and the obligatory good-looking hangers-on. It’s about the most highly-tuned machines on four wheels and their human counterparts being tested to their limits every fortnight for a year. And it starts this weekend in Adelaide. I mean, Melbourne.
And that’s the truth.
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