Opinion
With the Easter football weekend upon us it is time to unveil the Biblical First 13.
I suspect it is no coincidence that Jesus had 12 disciplines. It allowed him to travel with 13 people and play league when he wasn’t healing the sick or making fish fall out of the sky.
Apparently the grudge match between the Bethlehem Brothers and the Jerusalem Masons was always a highlight.
For this article I have taken the names of the disciplines and come up with a team of like-named contemporaries.
The criteria was pretty loose (whatever biblical name popped in my head). Below is my Biblical First 13.
1. Thomas Trbojevic (125 games for games Manly)
A player who would not be out of place in any 13. At full fitness a player who can walk on water and make those around him look like mere mortals.
(Photo by Cameron Spencer/Getty Images)
2. Noah Nadruku (92 games for Canberra, 39 for Nth Queensland)
Noah wasn’t actually a disciple and Noa’s name is spelt different but I needed to fill the team out so I was grateful for any biblical reference at this point.
A crowd favourite from the early 90’s, bustling down the wing for the Raiders, playing like we wished Maika Seva would these days. What an entertainer!
12. Andrew Ettingshausen (328 games for Cronulla)
ET, an excellent outside back and the undisputed NSWRL pin-up of the 80’s and 90’s. One of only a handful of players who can claim to have run along the beach in their speedos with Tina Turner. If the Biblical First 13 needs a glamour shot, ET is the man.
4. Mary McGregor (158 games for the Dragons)
Mary wasn’t a disciple either but I needed a centre so Paul “Mary” McGregor gets the call-up. A strong, side-stepping centre from the 90s. A natural footballer who played at the highest level.
5. Joseph Suaallii (28 games for the Roosters)
Joseph wasn’t a disciple either but I think it’s important that Joseph Suaalii is mentioned in every rugby league article in 2023.
At this stage of his career he is a very good player who has everything in his favour. Will he deliver over the next decade? All the wise-men and the prophets suggest that he will.
6. Phillip Gould (103 games for Penrith, Canterbury, Newtown and Souths)
Whilst I am pleased with myself for having Suaalii and Gould in the same team, I would’ve loved them to be half or second-row partners!
Believe it or not, Gould was actually a good footballer and at age 20 one of the youngest club captains ever. Injuries kept his career to only 103 games, mostly through the 80’s as a skilful backrower.
7. Peter Sterling (264 games for the Eels)
Someone who did everything in the game of rugby league. A great player, a great commentator and a good person. It almost seems like his commentary career has over-shadowed his playing career which is hard to do.
He was the Eels halfback in four premierships in the 80’s and won every honour there was. Wouldn’t be surprised if he lines up at the immortal gate one day.
8. Moses Leota (127 games for the Panthers)
Another of the current players with a name that demands consideration in the Biblical First 13. Everything you want in a prop and nothing you don’t.
Plays with intensity, comes in off the back-fence and with very few mistakes in his game. Great Panthers clubman and rep player for Samoa and NZ.
9. James Maloney (315 games for Storm, Warriors, Roosters, Sharks, Panthers, Les Catalans)
Not sure James Maloney spent a lot of time at Sunday School, but he is named after a disciple so he deserves to be considered. A competitor who had the knack of winning…a lot. Road trips would be a lot of fun with Maloney on the team bus.
Is James Maloney’s career somewhat underrated? (Photo by Quinn Rooney/Getty Images)
10. James Graham (423 games for St Helens, Canterbury, Dragons)
Apparently there were two disciples named James, so welcome to the team Mr Graham. An Old Testament maniac on the field and surprisingly well spoken off it.
You would love to have James Graham in your side, he played with emotion and was fiercely loyal to his team mates. Anyone who can play 400+ games in the front row deserves to be picked in the Biblical First 13. Glen Lazarus was also in the mix.
11. John Bateman (246 games for Bradford, Wigan, Canberra, Wests)
Surprisingly few Johns came to mind. I was trying to keep it modern and there just aren’t a lot of memorable Johns out there.
John Bateman gets the call up because it is his second coming to the NRL and because it will take a miracle to rescue the Tigers from their current predicament. John Elias and John Hopoate are notable Johns guilty of sin.
12. Simon Mannering (301 games for NZ)
Every team needs a workaholic like Simon Mannering. Close to your best player every week and super reliable. The Warrior’s most capped player who never put a foot wrong.
13. Nate Myles (234 games for the Bulldogs, Roosters, Titans, Sea Eagles and the Storm)
Not sure if Nate Myles was christened Nathaniel but he gets the nod on suspicion. Solid footballer with an even more solid skull, once used to headbutt Paul Gallen’s fist multiple times.
So there you have it, the Biblical First 13. Coached by Adam Elliot.
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