Seeing how much angst, gnashing of teeth, outrage and general tanty throwing is evoked each year by the Power Rankings, I thought it time to write an alternative version of the same list to give each of us something else to groan about.
Danielle however has well and truly overflowed her cup with just the first entry, so I needed to find something a little different.
Memorable Moments is based on what generated the most talking points or fond memories of the round. In fact, pretty much anything that gets us talking about league rates on the Memorable Moments Meter, so off-field incidents will poll points.
Of equal interest will be whether I maintain the enthusiasm to keep this going, which could be a Memorable Moment all its own.
So now we have criteria that are suitably vague, let’s launch into our first NRL Memorable Moments Meter.
It was always going to be the Dolphins. They could have been lapped twice in the first half by the Roosters, shown up to the wrong ground on the wrong day, or left the coach at home (Cairns anyone?) and they still would have polled first.
If there wasn’t enough theatre around Wayne Bennett alone, there is something inherently exciting about a new team coming into the competition and the excitement that this brings. While I can’t see them staying at the top for long, the new kids deserve their moment in the sun and our appreciation for adding another layer of interest to our 2023 season.
Nothing says rugby league more than a dejected Ricky Stuart complaining about match officials, referring decisions or basically anything except his team not being quite good enough. While we are usually treated to this several times a season, being blessed so fully in Round 1 is an unusual treat. On this healthy dose of form, the Raiders are looking strong for Memorable Moments this year.
Almost on the same level as the Raiders, we have the opportunity to start the year by wondering whether Mitchell Moses and Dylan Brown are good enough to win big matches. While the irony of coming straight out of a grand final appearance is overlooked in these discussions, when we throw Moses’ contract deliberations into the discussion we have the veritable petrol-on-the-campfire moment with singed eyebrows aplenty.
So powerful is this experience we almost forgot to look for Ryan Matterson.
The Broncos really are a selfish team. Just when we were all expecting a mediocre performance before being steam-rolled by the vengeful premiers on their way to a three-peat, the Broncos had to go and do something unexpected like playing well. Even worse, they’ve robbed us of the chance to speculate whether Kevvie will be the first coach sacked in 2023…at least until next week.
A redemption story, a recovery story, an entertaining game of football, a team that looks like they’ve gelled as a unit despite the rumblings from last year – Manly gave us a bit of everything.
If Turbo stays on the field, Manly will be casting the back of his legs in bronze to honour medical science. However, with a strong support cast of Anthony Seibold, Josh Schuster, Jake’s missing pass and a fashion-conscious playing group they are promising much for 2023.
Adam O’Brien felt the weight of expectation after the Broncos’ win as well as the Hook no-show by preparing his team to perform at their mediocre best. As a head coach, it’s important to shield the players from any unwanted attention and he’s generously done this by focusing it all on the likely duration of his coaching tenure.
Behind the main show, we have the interesting story arc of Kalyn Ponga’s affair with the number six jersey. It’s a tale of unrequited love, a league version of The Prince’s Bride. Having first come together a few years ago, they were cruelly separated before being brought back together. It’s inconceivable how many more challenges this relationship will endure.
(Photo by Ashley Feder/Getty Images)
Few teams attract more attention, interest, hatred, sombrero comments and pre-season premiership favouritism than the Roosters. Just being a part of the Dolphins debut attracts Memorable Moments points but being absolutely bog ordinary almost pushed them into the top 4.
It took courageous efforts from Adam O’Brien, Turbo’s arse (or thereabouts) and the Broncos’ selfishness to hold them in the fringe of the eight. Big prospects for this team if they continue to play at the Round 1 standard.
Despite some of the complaints about the antics of the players, this team already has given us so much over the past few years. Now we are all left wondering whether they can back it up again or if the mojo has disappeared.
Jarome Luai and Jaemon Salmon even conspired to give us an on-camera incident that evokes incredibly strong images of storms and teacups. There are whispers circulating that the players feel union star Ardie Savea has raised expectations so expect some interesting celebrations to follow.
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This team was always going to poll at nine in Round 1, with Hook conducting a coaching masterclass and the results showing what his team can achieve when they play perfectly to the game plan. It’s going to take more atrocities from the playing group to hold them this high up the ladder.
In breaking news, Eddie Jones has called for the Dragons’ gameplan to be yellow-carded for cynical play.
The Cowboys showed 30 minutes of brilliance and 50 minutes of meh, just enough to keep the ‘are they actually contenders’ embers burning. Bonus points were awarded for allowing Chad Townsend, the most over-priced under-valued halfback in the competition to take the win, setting the conditions for the Raiders topping the ladder.
We are so used to Storm starting the year broken that this hardly rates a mention anymore, nor does Craig Bellamy fielding a highly competitive team with superstar players who win the critical moments. Sustained excellence won’t help with this ladder, so the Storm will be relying on ‘will he or won’t he coach again’ conjecture and Nelson Asofa-Solomona playing Monopoly with the judiciary.
The Bulldogs should be disappointed with their Round 1 efforts. Technically, Gus Gould’s outburst about concussion and misinformation – which conveniently missed the information that CTE and concussion are not the same things – was considered a late play but was discarded for having missed the submission timeline. Better luck next week lads.
Noteworthy for the number of headlines highlighting David Fafita’s return to form because he made a break. Results this weak reflect normal business for the Titans, with some promise but nothing remarkable.
Apparently, they won.
Apparently, they didn’t.
A really good team playing really good football is not really comment-worthy. The Bunnies have built a fine reputation for controversy in past seasons so they will do better in the weeks ahead.
A really good team playing really good football, without their best player, and narrowly losing to another really good team is not really comment-worthy either. This team really needs to try harder to get a microphone to Toby Rudolph.
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