Like that moment in Groundhog Day when the annoying DJs start babbling fresh patter after ‘I’ve Got You Babe’ comes on the radio to start the day, the ODI series between Sri Lanka and Australia at last came to an improbable end.
Australia won the final game by five overs, seven wickets and as many as 20 to 30 people still interested in watching.
Here are the ratings from the fifth ODI between Sri Lanka and Australia.
Constancy
Grade: B
Australia were unchanged for the final game, mostly because everybody else had headed home. (Click to Tweet)
Also unchanged? Australia’s inability to win the toss. Because despite Sri Lanka mixing everything up (crazily reducing their Perera count down to what I assume is their bare minimum of two), Dave Warner still called incorrectly and the Australians were asked to bowl first yet again.
But you know what was different this time? Mitchell Starc’s first over, which went curiously wicketless.
This shocking run of bad form from Starc is probably why the selectors had been left with no choice but to drop him from the upcoming tour of South Africa.
Opening partnerships
Grade: B+
Starc’s utter hopelessness meant that Sri Lanka got off to their best start of the series, with the openers putting on 73 from 13.5 overs.
One theory for this astonishing turn of events was that Australia were going to allow Sri Lanka to put on 445, just to shut up all the England supporters who’d been banging on endlessly about how England were now the greatest side in ODI history ever since they’d made 444 against Pakistan a week or so ago.
It seemed not too much to ask each of the five main Australian bowlers to go for 0-89 off their ten overs in order to allow Sri Lanka to knock the crowing England side off their insufferable perch.
But you know who did think it was too much to ask? Selfish old James Faulkner, that’s who. Because he broke the first wicket partnership, triggering a mini-collapse of 3-5 off nine balls, and putting the 445 out of range.
You win again, England.
Michael Gough
Grade: D-
Things went from bad to worse for Sri Lanka, as they so often do. Although to be fair, things can only otherwise go from bad to better or bad to equally bad and neither of those options are usually worth talking about.
From 0-73, Sri Lanka collapsed to 195 all out, with still the better part of ten overs left to bat. The most controversial of these wickets was that of Kusal Perera, who was trapped LBW by Travis Head. A sufficiently embarrassing turn of events for Perera to send the decision upstairs, where video evidence seemed to show an inside edge from the bat into the pad.
However, third umpire Michael Gough disagreed, ruling there was no bat involved. Strange from Gough, who is perhaps most famous for his role as Bruce Wayne’s butler Alfred in the Tim Burton Batman movies, and who should therefore, presumably, be much better at bat-spotting.
The Australian way
Grade: F
Chasing 196 for victory, Australia opened the batting with Warner and Matthew Wade. The wicketkeeper was opening in place of Aaron Finch, who had decided about halfway through Australia’s fielding innings that he’d also quite like to head home.
Would Wade prove himself to be Australia’s greatest ever ODI wicketkeeper-opening batsman? Perhaps. But not this innings, as he somehow found himself sweeping the ball straight into the keeper’s gloves, for Perera to take a smart catch.
Having said that, it doesn’t really seem fair that Wade should be allowed to be given out to a catch he’d almost certainly fail to take himself. Hopefully, the ICC will close this loophole sooner rather than later.
With Usman Khawaja making his standard brief cameo (this time, six from six balls), it was left to Warner to finally find some form with the bat if Australia were going to win this game. And so he did, making 106 from 126 balls to take his team to the brink of victory, before Faulkner did his finishing thing.
After the previous game, Warner had lauded the “Australian way” of playing cricket, of being constantly aggressive and playing positively and all the other usual obnoxious nonsense that Australian cricketers bang on about when they win and conveniently ignore when they’re being thrashed. And his innings here proved yet again that the Australian way was the best way to play if you want to win games of cricket.
Although, of course, the Sri Lankan way, the England way and, heck, even the Bangladesh way, are also incredibly effective ways to win games of cricket, especially when you ignore all those games where that method of playing results in defeat.
Steve Smith
Grade: A
And so it came to pass that Australia remained undefeated since Steve Smith went home. Outstanding captaincy from Smith. Only the very best leaders of men know when men don’t want to be led by them. And by that measure, Smith is a great leader of men indeed.
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